How quickly they grow out of clothes

The nanny was excited to see all of Kaia’s new clothes, both clothes I’d recently purchased as well as gifts that I finally pulled out of the drawers to have washed, as she finally fits a lot of these now. She looked at a number of the clothes labeled as “12 months” in size and held them against Kaia.

“12 months?! You may only get 1-2 wears out of some of these NOW, and she’s 10 months now!” the nanny exclaimed.

That’s funny to think about. When my baby was born, she was so small that she didn’t even fit her newborn clothes. I felt a little worried about it, but in the end, she grew well and gained weight at a healthy rate. And well… the upside of having a small baby is that they get more wears out of all their newborn to 0-3 month clothes! Amazingly, some of the Australian clothes she was gifted that are 0-3 months she still manages to fit!!!! These things run big and are stretchy!

Orthopedic doctor visit – again

I was finally able to make an appointment to get my mommy thumb condition checked out this Tuesday. After over 5 months of dealing with pain in both my thumbs, oftentimes sharp and sudden, hopefully I’ll get some help with it all this week. Based on everything I’ve read, a cortisone/steroid shot seems to be the only path to any real reduction of pain, especially now that we’ve seen that ibuprofen does little to nothing for me. But I was told by the receptionist that I’d need to rest my thumbs for the next several days to allow the area to heal, assuming that is the chosen course of treatment. She said no heavy lifting — including of a baby. And my baby is not little anymore. She’s probably about 20 pounds now!

It makes me wonder… how the hell do mothers do this without any help at all – from a spouse, a mother, a friend, a nanny??

Downton Abbey

Since Kaia’s arrival, we obviously haven’t been spending too much time out watching movies or going to different shows or the theater. Babysitting not only gets expensive, but now given that Kaia is 10 months old, she’s in prime “stranger danger” mode, so even paying for help outside of the nanny could end up increasing her anxiety. Instead, after she goes to bed on Friday and Saturday nights, we’ve been watching Downton Abbey. Yeah, yeah, I know: it’s about 10+ years late. But it’s not like I’ve ever watched any show in its prime. Plus, with Downton, just the quick synopsis of it didn’t really interest me very much, but Chris insisted I would like it. And well, he was right. Sure, on the outset, a show about British aristocracy who don’t even know what “work” or the “weekend” is doesn’t really interest me. But the character development on the show is really rich, plus I love the interactions between the “upstairs” family and the “downstairs” servants family. The best thing about Downton is that most characters are very nuanced, just like with people in real life: no one is really all good or all bad. No one is a hero or a villain. We live in a world of shades of grey, not black and white. You don’t always love or hate any major character. You go through moments when you want to hug them and others when you want to punch them in the face. That’s what makes them all so relatable. It’s probably not realistic how well the Crawley family treats their servants, but hey, this is still TV, right?

I’m still not over Matthew dying. Chris laughs at me about it. But this is what happens when you really get invested in the character development and the story line.

Auria’s Malaysian Kitchen – curry spice blend to the rescue

Since Kaia’s birth, although I have still enjoyed cooking, I have also been focused on making things that require less effort and time for obvious reasons. Time is limited when you are not only a new mother but also an exclusive pumper and working full time, so while I want tasty, homemade food, I can’t spend all weekend cooking anymore.

Auria’s Malaysian Kitchen has been quite the God-send during this time. I’ve used her spice blend packets more times than I can remember since Kaia was born, and the latest way I’ve used it is through a method she recently posted on her Instagram reels: instead of using the curry spice blend to make a curry like stew per se, she uses the blend with a little salt and yogurt to coat chicken thighs, then pan fries them on the stove until cooked through. Instead of tending to cooking the meat on the stove, after an overnight marinade with the spices and yogurt, I roasted them in the oven at 425 F for 20 minutes, and then blasted them under the broiler for an additional 4 minutes for some color per her message to me. And it worked out perfectly: the meat was cooked through and still juicy, and it was super flavorful!

I decided to let Kaia have some, too. Even though it does have a little brown sugar, I figured that a little sugar in the overall packet wouldn’t be too much for her. In addition, her portion would be so small. Plus, she’s getting closer to 1 year, so no point in being super insane about avoiding sugar now. I just didn’t add any salt to her chicken thigh. I had her nanny try the chicken beforehand, and while she enjoyed it, she said she thought it might be too spicy for Kaia. At her 5pm feed today, the chicken was the first thing she had… and not only did she accept and eat it, but she didn’t even cry for yogurt or water the way she has done in the past when given really spicy foods! She happily babbled throughout and ate her roasted curried chicken.

“What have you done to your baby?!” the nanny exclaimed, in total shock and awe.

I’m so proud of my little baby, embracing spice and heat.

Postpartum hair loss – not the kind you think

When I reached about five months postpartum, every shower when I’d wash my hair, I would dread. Because then, I was losing clumps and clumps of hair each time I tried to comb. And it was miserable. I was wondering if I’d start developing bald spots. Luckily for me, I did not, and since I already have very fine hair, it wasn’t that noticeable. Now that Kaia is older and far more aware of her surroundings, she’s also very interested… in literally everything. She pulls on her nanny’s necklaces and earrings. She pulls at my ears and nose, tries to put her fingers in my mouth, and occasionally tries to touch my eyeballs. And the most painful thing she does? She tries to pull my hair constantly. I only have my hair down on days I wash it, so on those days… she goes crazy and tries to get as many handfuls of my hair as possible. And on the other days when I have it pulled into a pony tail or bun, she still manages to pull the loose or baby strands and tug until they come out. At one time, she’s gotten as much as five strands of hair pulled out.

Yep, this is what it is to have a rapidly growing and curious baby.

Rainy weather

It’s been raining since Saturday, and it’s been quite miserable. I don’t consider myself someone who gets seasonal depression, but I do feel sad and more moody when we transition from summer to autumn, then autumn to winter every year, as the shorter days and longer nights always annoy me, not to mention the dip in temperature. And when it’s rainy and grey outside, there’s little to no incentive for me to get out for fresh air. And then, even though I only have to go down to the third floor for the gym, I don’t even feel like going. That’s super lazy, but it’s my general feeling. I struggle to bring myself to even want to go down 16 flights of stairs via an elevator. Talk about feeling bratty and making lame excuses.

But after a few days, I eventually emerge from it all and drag myself to the gym. And I feel good once I do and get mad at myself for my previous laziness. This happens literally every single year when the seasons change. I’m that predictable with my timed laziness. 😀

Girl mom and accessorizing

Kaia’s hair is growing quite fast now. As she’s almost 10 months old, she now has a natural deep part on her head, with long bangs being swept to her left side. We’ve mostly just been sweeping it to her left, but it’s been getting a little out of hand and still getting in her face, especially when she’s been rolling and playing around on the floor. I started looking at baby and toddler hair barrettes, especially clips that she can use through her elementary school years, and so many look cheap and flimsy. Others seem to look like they’d probably last one or two wears and break. Some seem like they’d have small parts that would fall off and end up as potential choking hazards. So I thought I’d spend a little more on some handmade ones that, fingers crossed, will last a while and still be wearable when she’s an older girl.

Well, that led me into a browsing session on Etsy, and I found a handful that seemed like they’d not only be cute but last a while. They are also lined and seem like they’d fit comfortably on a small head and stay put. They’re also good for fine hair, which Kaia seems to have, just like me. And… it also resulted in about $43 spent. I justified it in my head that these would last longer than cheaper ones that were mass produced… but in the end, I guess this is just a part of being a girl mom — accessorizing and making my daughter look cute is going to add up, apparently. At least I haven’t spent that much on clothing for her to date thanks to all the generous gifts she was given.

Baby clothes

I have friends who went crazy when they had babies, especially girls, buying them the most expensive and ridiculously adorable outfits, just to be worn once or twice and then immediately outgrown and put away/given away/donated. I didn’t really want to be THAT mom and be that wasteful, even though I obviously did want my baby to look cute. We’ve been super fortunate and lucky in that we’ve had so many friends and family give Kaia endless clothing. The majority of these clothes were for 0-9 months, the last of which she’s finally wearing now, and most of which she’s already outgrown and I’ve bagged up for storage. I hate to say this, but pretty much all the clothes that were gifted to her via our baby registry I had to end up returning because she was gifted so many cute and fitting things outside of the registry. So when the weather starting changing this last month, the nanny commented to me that I needed to start getting Kaia clothes to match the season. So Chris picked out a few outerwear pieces, and I purchased some warmer, autumn/winter pieces for her today.

“Big spender!” Chris commented, when he saw the clothing transaction in our Mint account listed.

Well, not really. In her first 9 months of life, I think I purchased a total of six onesies for her… and mostly from Old Navy during a sale. So in other words, I was being el cheapo mom. I also got a few more for her 9-12 month period that she’s finally wearing now, but it’s not really enough. We had some thoughtful friends who purchased clothes for her in the 12-24 month range, as they had kids themselves and said they were gifted WAY too many newborn and 0-3 month clothes, and figured the same would happen to us.

I told the nanny that I made a small purchase of new clothes for Kaia, and that Chris called me a big spender. She laughed.

“Chris better get used to it!” the nanny exclaimed. “Babies need clothes, and baby clothes don’t come cheap, especially girl clothes!”

Baby talk

I can’t believe my baby is almost 10 months old. She’s crawling faster and faster and trying to pull up to stand. And her babble is sounding more and more like she’s trying to say real words. What has been really cute is her daily crawl to where I’ve put her books on our TV stand. She goes over there, pulls out all her books, and tries to flip the pages of the more sturdy board books. For the Ditty Bird Chinese nursery rhymes book, she knows where on the page to press the button to play the song, though she does not quite understand that she needs to remove her finger to let the song play… and instead, keeps rubbing the button, causing the song to start from the beginning again and again. 😀

Babies create their own fusion of sounds and “words,” and so when she starts going towards the books, she starts babbling away “bahh bahh bahh,” making me wonder if she is trying to say “book.” How cute it would be if “book” is to be her first word!

Bringing baby to an adult event: Laksapalooza

The Sambal Lady had her annual food and beer event in her backyard this evening in Flatbush, and so Chris insisted that we not miss out on it. Kaia is almost 10 months old now, meaning she’s in prime “stranger danger” mood, and having a random babysitter look after her didn’t really sit well with me. Our nanny was out of town in Florida, so we couldn’t ask her to look after her, either. So we ended up just bringing her to Laksapalooza. To make matters worse, it was raining, so they had to do an outdoor tent setup outside and seat us in two groups of 20 indoors, rotating in Auria’s basement. It actually worked out really well; it was super organized and everyone was in a good mood from the delicious food and wide variety of beers and ciders.

Kaia isn’t used to being around big crowds, so I think she got a little fussy because of that. We didn’t have a good place to put her when we were outside, so we left her in her car seat on a table away from the loud music and chatter and periodically went to check on her after she had fallen asleep. While socializing, I thought I heard some high pitched crying, so I went to check on her and found her screaming and crying, upset at being left alone in a foreign place. Auria was super accommodating and hospitable to us: she let us store breast milk in her fridge, heat up milk in her kitchen, and change Kaia’s diapers in her living room. Kaia was not a fan, though. She kept looking around as though in wide-eyed terror, wondering where the hell we took her. It took forever to calm her down and she was still crying when we got an Uber to take us home. I felt a little guilty, but we didn’t really have great alternatives given the situation.

The moral of the story is: babysitters, especially ones you and the baby don’t know, don’t always solve problems, especially when your baby is in “stranger danger” age range. And when you don’t have close family nearby, you don’t have many options for childcare that don’t feel like you are burdening other people. Because even when close friends say they are happy to babysit…. they are really just saying that because it sounds good, not because they really do want to go out of their way to help you unless it’s literally life or death. And sometimes, you just have to suck it up and bring your baby. It gives them more exposure, and frankly in life, you can’t always be comfortable and have every single tiny need met, as a baby or an adult