When the mundane and everyday are funny

I say this all the time, but one of the absolute best things about New York City is that there are endless things to do here, and so it never gets boring. Part of the reason there are endless things to do here is that people are constantly coming, whether it’s family and friends visiting, tourists or huge musical acts, stand-up comedians, and everything and anything related to entertainment. Chances are high that if you are in entertainment in some form, you will be coming to New York at some point, if not often.

Last night, we went to see the Taiwanese-American comedian Sheng Wang at Town Hall. We originally saw him open one of Ali Wong’s shows a couple years ago, and since then, we’ve been following him on social media. I still remember when I was in middle/high school and how I never really thought I’d see Asians in entertainment in the western world in my lifetime. And thankfully, how wrong I was! Sheng Wang is extremely down-to-earth. He’s like the guy who is super smart in the room but tries to hide it from everyone by acting meek. He is most definitely laugh-out-loud funny and about the most seemingly mundane things: lack of “ambiance” as a priority in the immigrant household, young kids making you go broke because of how much they love and inhale all your berries (read: the expensive fruit with all the antioxidants… you just know you are not supposed to like “oxidants”), a Black and Decker toaster oven vs. a Breville oven. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that the funniest comedians can do just that: take the boring and mundane things in life and make you laugh until you cry, just by seeing them from another perspective, one that isn’t usually talked about or explored in depth.

I’m so happy that Kaia will grow up seeing Asians in mainstream media in the West. It’s a very different childhood she will have from the one I had, in more ways than one.

Laser Excel V+ results, almost one week later

The scabs have slowly but surely been flaking off my face. I’ve already passed the five-day mark of using the post-treatment skin regimen morning and night. I looked at my skin today and realized that yes, there actually has been quite a bit of positive change. I used to have all these tiny little black dots on my face, and after the scabs have fallen off, they’re completely out of sight now. There are still some tiny scabs left on my face, but given that so many have already come off and revealed new, un-pigmented skin, this seemed like a win. A large sun spot on the left side of my face by my eye had a scab that fully flaked off today, and it’s completely different than what it used to look like: it used to be quite raised, with tiny brown dots that had all accumulated together like little cells on a petri dish. Once this scab flaked off, lightly brown tinted skin was revealed. No raised skin was there anymore; the skin is completely smooth there. I took a look at photos of myself just a few weeks before, and that spot was noticeable from a distance, and not anymore! The esthetician and my referring friend told me the spots would continue to lighten in the next week, so I’m keeping an eye on them. It will be interesting to see how much more it lightens at this rate.

Unfortunately, given the skin on my neck is a lot more delicate, most of the tiny scabs have remained and have been slower to flake off. But I figure in another week, they should flake off fine on their own. I’m pretty impressed so far with just one laser Excel V+ treatment, as I had my hopes high when my friend said that she did one treatment, and she was told after that her skin responded so well to it that it appeared as though she had two cycles of treatment already. I thought, I hope that’s me! If the scabs keep coming off and reveal new skin as it has been in the last day or so, I might get one more treatment and call it quits. It’s quite a pretty penny, but I feel good about this investment so far.

More crappy service at food establishments

Today was our first day leaving the house with an un-diapered Kaia, excluding going to school, of course. It was a bit nerve racking because it’s only been a week since we started really potty training, and she’s never used a toilet in a public bathroom. So, we sucked it up and brought our travel potty seat to place on top of a public toilet (yuck, I know) to see if she’d embrace it. And… how, she did not.

She screamed and cried when I tried to put her on top of the seat in a public restroom in the West Village today. We tried again at another public restroom at Murray’s Cheese, and she still refused to pee, even though she said she wanted to pee. In the end, she held her pee in for the entire 5+ hours we were out to finally pee in her little potty when we got home. That is good discipline, but I need her to be comfortable using public restrooms that are 1) not her little potty and 2) not at home.

She finally fell asleep while we walked further south to SoHo in search of something quick and easy to eat. I looked at my Google Maps bookmarks list and saw that Rice Kitchen was a spot I recently added to the list of easy-take out to try. It had made-to-order Korean-style rice bowls and kimbap. I ordered the black sesame tuna kimbap and the bulgogi rice bowl with kimchi aioli on top. As soon as I walked in, though, and saw the cashier, I just had a weird feeling. She gave me a strange, unwelcoming look as I approached the counter, and after I said I’d like the tuna kimbap, and as I was mid-sentence about to order a second item, she cut me off, spun the screen around so I could pay, and told me the total cost of what I’d have to pay. I wrinkled my brow, paused, and told her I wasn’t done. She didn’t apologize, turned the screen back to her, sighed, and said, “Okay, what else would you like?” She didn’t bother asking me if I wanted a drink or anything else after the first kimbap order was made clear, or even after I ordered another main. She seemed like a ditzy worker who couldn’t even be bothered actually being hospitable, and I was not pleased at all with the service. Even when I popped my head in to see if my order was ready, she simply shook her head and said, “No, not ready yet.”

I don’t know if I’m just getting older, but this crappy service always annoys me and rubs me the wrong way, especially when a stupid screen gets flipped my way and I’m asked to tip at least 25% — for what? For ringing up an order and glazing her eyes over at me when she isn’t happy I haven’t ordered fast and efficiently enough?

When dining out in Manhattan is actually good post-pandemic

Since the pandemic year of 2020, we really haven’t done much dining out in Manhattan at multiple dollar sign places. And a number of times when we have, it’s always been a bit of a disappointment: the food is priced higher than you’d be comfortable with, “suggested” tips start at 25-30%, service really misses its mark, and the whole experience just feels rushed and underwhelming. Even for mid-priced food when dining out, it’s almost impossible to have a meal with multiple dishes and a drink for less than $50 per person in Manhattan unless you’re going to a total hole-in-the-wall. I especially get frustrated at the declining service levels in restaurants. Servers have not known what dishes are when we ask for a clearer description, they have specials, but they don’t know what the specials are before they come to our table, or they just seem clueless in general and are clearly there just to pick up a paycheck and leave. Then, there are the servers who constantly hover over your table when you’re clearly in a deep conversation and keep interrupting to see if you need anything else. I read that as a cue that no, they don’t want to actually see if we need anything else, but they want us to rush through our meal so that they can turn over the table and get another party seated (who can, in the end, increase revenue for the restaurant and increase their own tips). It doesn’t make me feel welcome to sit down and eat, and it certainly should not merit an “industry standard” of a 20-percent tip. That feels like a sense of entitlement when they haven’t even done the work to merit that tip.

So, I was pleasantly surprised when my friend and I went to eat at Frena tonight before our Lincoln Center show. Frena replaced Taboon after had to close due to a fire, and the owner completely gut-renovated the place, complete with a big open oven at the front. We each ordered a drink, had three appetizers, a salad, and two mains, and I am shocked to say that literally every single dish and drink we ordered was spectacular, full of flavor and even surprises. This is almost *never* the case at fancier, more expensive restaurants like Frena. There’s always at least one dish that kind of makes you think, really? That was fine, but not great. But luckily for us, that was not the case here. The bread, which came with the three dips we ordered, was made fresh in the open oven, and it was mouth wateringly good. Plus, the service felt warm and welcoming. The server clearly knew the menu and the specials inside and out, and not for a minute did I ever feel like he was hovering over us and just wanting to turn over our table for the next party of 2.

Most of the good restaurants we go to now are outside of Manhattan, where for whatever reason, the service seems to be warmer and more genuine, and where the food is less pretentious and stands on its own. But Frena was not part of the Manhattan dining stereotype I’ve developed in my head over the last couple of years: it actually was worth every penny we spent based on food quality, service, and ambiance. And it’s so close to home, too!

Kent mango vs. Ataulfo mango: which is better?

From March through July of each year, our household is loyal to Ataulfo mangoes, also known as champagne mangoes. They are relatively small, yellow, and have a sweet, honey-like flavor. The flavor is a bit one-noted, but it’s always deeply satisfying. The flesh is also a deep yellow/orange color and never fibrous at all. Very occasionally, I will buy Kent mangoes, which I always refer to as the Mexican mangoes available in the U.S. that are much larger than Ataulfo, but far less flavorful. They are also a bit hit or miss: you can easily get one that may smell fragrant, but once you cut into it, it’s stringy and fibrous. And as we all know, texture can be just as important as flavor in a piece of fruit. Who wants a stringy mango?

It’s been clear since we returned from our South America trip that the Ataulfo mango season is coming to its end. So while we haven’t bought any of these, while in Elmhurst this past Saturday, I came across a fruit cart that sold these huge, fat Kent mangoes, three for $5. I also remember a few people saying in my social media feed that this year’s harvest of Kents were at their very best. So I figured that $5 is a good price to try these out.

After I peeled and cut my Kent mango, I noticed a few things: this large Kent mango yielded about 2-3 times as much flesh as a single Ataulfo mango. The flesh was not fibrous at all, but on the paler yellow side when you compare it to the Ataulfo mango’s deep yellow/orange hue. This is not relevant to taste at all, but the Kent mango skin was much thicker than an Ataulfo’s, making it a bit more resistant to peeling (and a tiny bit more challenging as a result). And when I had a few chunks after cutting it up, I noticed that the flavor was more citrusy than an Ataulfo’s. An Ataulfo is more honey-like, almost creamy and rich. The Kent flesh is more juicy than it is creamy… if that makes any sense. I enjoyed both of them, but I think the flavor is much stronger in an Ataulfo than in a Kent.

And so, our love and preference for Ataulfo mangoes continues while we are in the U.S. Though, I will still buy Kent mangoes once Ataulfos are harder and more expensive now that we’re entering the month of August, assuming I find them at a decent price. I can’t say no to a mango (unless it’s flavorless and/or stringy!).

Thai jasmine rice: Hom Mali and government certification

I’ve been listening to Pailin (of Hot Thai Kitchen)’s new podcast, Sabai, like it’s my new best friend. I’ve been following her for years now. For the longest time, I thought that Thai food was too difficult or required too many ingredients to make at home. After watching just a few of her videos, I’ve realized that it’s actually quite approachable, easy to execute (well, most dishes…), and has quite the overlap with Chinese and Vietnamese ingredients I normally buy. Thai food is exactly what she says: if something is different than what you are used to, then you think it’s strange or too difficult. Pai does an amazing job demystifying Thai food and making it seem like easy home-cooking for anyone.

Pai recently had an episode where she and her cohost, Hong Thaimee, discussed rice. I had no idea what a commodity real Thai jasmine rice was. Unless we buy white or brown basmati or Japanese medium grain rice, we normally buy white/brown jasmine rice that is always imported from Thailand. But Pai and Hong specified in their rice episode that because Thai jasmine rice has become so popular, many “fakes” have come out in the market from Cambodia, Vietnam, and Laos, and the quality and fragrance just are not the same. So they insisted for true authenticity, we had to look for the green circle logo for Thai government certification, which has some grains of rice in the image. And if we got this, we would know for sure that we were getting premium Thai jasmine rice of the highest quality. Of course, I’d take any recommendation Pai gave me, so I took a screen shot of the government certification image and saved it on my phone for future reference.

Yesterday, I went down to Manhattan Chinatown and visited my favorite Vietnamese market to pick up some more white jasmine rice. And I realized that the rice I had previously been buying actually *was* Thai government certified, and it wasn’t too expensive (five pounds for $7). Well, this was an exciting discovery: I had already been buying the “in the know” rice before I actually knew! I also picked up a bag of purple rice since I still had some space in my backpack. I ended up walking eight pounds of rice, a bottle of light soy sauce, and a small bag of Chinese bakery goodies, all the way from Chinatown and eventually up to Koreatown. I think that’s my rucking for the day.

Getting older: Different vibes in the same places

My friend is visiting from San Francisco this week for work, so we went out to dinner tonight at an izakaya in the East Village. While the food was fine, it wasn’t anything to get excited about, and there was no “wow” factor in any single dish of the small plates/bowls we ordered. It was a bit of a downer (and when I shared this with Chris, he poked at me for glorifying the East Village dining scene… which is probably fair in this case). But at least it gave us some quiet time to catch up without many others around. Similar to how we would “open” restaurants in Uruguay and Argentina, we ended up being the first guests to arrive at 6pm here, and no one really started coming in until around 7:30 when we getting towards the end of our meal.

Afterwards, we chatted while walking all the way up to Koreatown, where we ended up at HHD (Heuk Hwa Dang), an international Korean franchise of bubble tea, croffles, specialty drinks, shaved ice, and coffee. Unusual for Koreatown, the space is very large, with plenty of tables, as well as large “step” seating, and the menu for desserts is huge. So we shared a massive mango strawberry “snowflake” (it’s essentially a shaved ice, except with shaved sweetened milk “ice”), generously topped with freshly cut fruit, jellies, and some soft-serve vanilla ice cream. As we spoke, we realized that our own voices had to keep getting louder and louder because we were surrounded by other people who were at least 10-15 years younger than us, talking and laughing loudly while enjoying their own shared snowflakes.

My friend chuckled and said, “It’s as though I can’t hear because it’s so loud in here… I keep straining to hear you! Are we getting older and just can’t tolerate this much noise, or are the acoustics here just that bad?”

It’s probably a little of A and B. We prefer quieter places to catch up when we see each other since we don’t see each other too often living on opposite ends of the country. Yes, the acoustics were pretty poor. But it was comical to think that while we would have been happy spending hours hanging out at a place this loud and young in our early 20s, now in our late 30s, there’s definitely a limit to how much time we want to be at these places. We don’t necessarily blend in because of our age and how we dress into crowds like these anymore. And as much as I love the East Village, I am definitely on the older side when it comes to people wandering around its streets now, even if I can still pass for much younger.

Indonesian food: Under-rated, under appreciated

When I lived in Elmhurst, Queens, from 2008-2012, I felt like Elmhurst was always this under-the-radar type neighborhood in Queens that never really got its due. Then, the rents were cheap, the area was safe for families and kids (it still is, in both regards, relatively speaking). And what was top of mind to me was that the food was so, so eclectic. Before I lived in Elmhurst, I had zero idea what Indonesian food was. So to think that I finally lived in a neighborhood where, on a single block, I could pick up Colombian pastries, eat Indian-Chinese fusion, have authentic Taiwanese breakfast, grab some fresh tomatillos for homemade salsa verde, and then have a full Indonesian lunch spread, was just mind-boggling.

We came back to Elmhurst yesterday and stumbled across a coffee shop that turns into a fun wine bar at night called Elm Roastery, right on Broadway, which is the main artery of Elmhurst. We ordered an ube latte and a jasmine lemonade, both of which tasted strongly of what they are made of (you’d be shocked how often this is not the case). The service was very warm and friendly. The decor was modern, sleek, and chic. There are ample tables where you can meet up with friends one on one or in small groups. And they have a large open counter that is designated a laptop-free zone (which I LOVE) where it’s meant for socializing and meeting new people. One of the walls was lined with handmade items for purchase, all made by local Queens-based artists so that locals can buy local. The bathroom was huge, well designed, and even had a European-style changing table (very similar to the ones I used when in Germany), complete with a cushion for your little one and thoughtful little shelves for you to temporarily place things like diapers, wipes, and diaper cream. We used this, and I was so grateful to have a cushion for Kaia and to not change her on the floor. I was stunned; 12 years ago, I would have loved for a spot to be like this in my ‘hood! It’s the time for the rest of New York City to finally embrace Elmhurst now that fun spots like these are popping up!

We revisited one Indonesian spot that I’d eaten at with a friend about ten years ago. Then, it was called Sky Cafe, but it has since been renamed to Sumatera. The owner retired, but the staff, chef, and menu remained the same. When I’d visited here before, I had never been to Indonesia. So coming here now, I actually had something solid to reference. And this meal was just like a meal I’d get in Jakarta or Yogyakarta: we ordered nasi padang bungkus, which is basically a big stuffed banana leaf with a variety of delicious things, like seasoned rice, a boiled egg, beef rendang, savory jackfruit curry, spiced shredded kale, and sambal; mie complit, which is a big bowl of chewy wheat-based noodles topped with ground chicken, bouncy beef and fish balls, a soy-sauce marinated egg, bok choy, deep-fried wontons (fried to order!), with a side bowl of deeply flavored chicken soup; an avocado shake (topped with Milo!!); and while all the above was beyond delicious and flavorful, the biggest highlight for me was the homemade cendol, made to order. The first time I’d ever had gula melaka, this nutty, toasty palm sugar that comes from a specific type of coconut palm found in Southeast Asia, it was in Yogyakarta in a cendol. The flavor was so deep, nutty, toasty, and distinct that no regular granulated sugar could have replicated the same flavor. Here, when we ordered it, the server warned it it would take some time to make. They were literally churning out the cendol jellies to order, which were green from pandan. They added the jellies to a tall glass of ice, coconut milk, and thick, brown gula melaka. And after I had just one sip, I was taken back to Indonesia. The flavor was exactly the same. It was as though I was brought to Indonesian dessert heaven.

Indonesian food is a rare find in the U.S., but I’m grateful to have semi-easy access to it here in New York City, in my original neighborhood of Elmhurst, in my original New York borough of Queens.

Catch ups over black sesame lattes and chamomile mango mousse

Chris always gets annoyed with me whenever I say that I don’t love our general neighborhood (Hell’s Kitchen / Upper West Side) for food. It’s not that I think the food options are terrible here (they are NOT by any standard), but it’s more that when I think of incredible places to eat with a lot of variety (cuisines) at multiple price points, these two neighborhoods that we’re right in the middle of are not within the top 10 (or even 20) across all of New York City for me. However, what I have noticed in the last five years is that a number of places that originally open in areas like East Village (my dream eating neighborhood), Lower East Side, or other great food areas downtown, are now opening their second or third locations in this general area. One of those places is Patisserie Fouet, which has been on my radar for a while. It’s owned and run by a Japanese pastry chef who was trained in French pastry, so the desserts are very much French in technique with hints of Asian flavors here and there. She opened her first location in the Union Square area (complete with a dessert tasting menu), and she decided to open a second location just eight blocks away from us in Hell’s Kitchen, in front of a popular udon spot called Raku. Raku is likely my favorite udon place in all of New York City. I went to their first (and then only location) about ten years ago and was obsessed with the udon and all the dishes I ate there with a friend. Since then, they’ve opened two other locations, one in SoHo and one in Hell’s Kitchen. So now, that’s two popular, fun, and semi-trendy places that are downtown that have now come uptown within short walking distance of us!

I went to Patisserie Fouet in Hell’s Kitchen and met my friend there for a mid-afternoon catch-up. We shared two desserts, while she had a cold brew barley tea, and I enjoyed an iced black sesame latte. I have always preferred one-on-one catch ups over group catchups, but I particularly love meeting with this friend 1:1 because she is so empathetic, insightful, and pointed in her questions and observations. She doesn’t shy away from vulnerable topics and instead, actually invites them. She sees a lot of things in people that most others either never notice or don’t want to point out. The older I get, and the more entrenched in being a parent I become, the harder it is to make real, lasting friendships with people who I find genuinely interesting. And in group situations, it can get awkward very quickly to discuss any touchy topic or anything seemingly exposing of yourself. So I feel thankful I’ve found this friend and we can be totally open and share unflattering things about ourselves, things we’ve done, and our relationships, and that it doesn’t negatively impact how we see each other. In fact, it actually does the opposite: it helps us better relate to and respect each other for being so candid… and being open about the fact that we’re all deeply flawed individuals who are just trying to do their best in life and with others. If anything, we should applaud ourselves for having that level of self-awareness to see that we probably do “wrong” things all the time but do make an intentional attempt to be better and do better.

Doing all the things with your visiting friend that you cannot normally do with littles

A friend of mine who lives in San Francisco is coming to New York for work next week, and so we’re planning to meet up on Monday and Thursday night. She’s extended her trip to stay with us for Thursday night and will leave Friday evening. When I asked her what she wanted to do while in New York or if there were any restaurants or cafes she wanted to check out, she simply responded that she wanted to go restaurants or spots that she couldn’t do with young children or babies… so in other words, speakeasy-type venues, cramped and small restaurants you couldn’t easily roll a stroller into, or places where you’d never even think of asking the server for a high chair at.

It was kind of funny when she responded this way because I could completely relate. I have a growing list (as always) of places I’d like to eat at in New York, but given the weekends are with Pookster, a large percentage of those places are just a no-go with a young child. It’s not to blame your child, but more recognizing that some venues just are not suitable for families or young children. And that’s okay. So we’re planning to do a tiny izakaya meal and have afternoon tea during her time here. Even though we’re both mothers now, we still enjoy and crave adult time and time to catch up one on one… without the constant injections of screaming and toddler questions that would happen if our kids were around and we tried to converse.