Today, we took a day trip to Isla Mujeres, which is about 13 kilometers from Cancun. It’s a popular destination for locals for day trips, as well as Mexican and international tourists as a place to stay overnight or on vacation given the tranquil, clear waters and the fun island vibe. The island is small, but too big to walk all around it, so we rented a golf buggy to tour the island for the day. I wasn’t totally sure how we would get around when we got there. Chris left us at the ferry station to go find the best deal on a golf buggy, and when he returned, he pulled up in one.

The last time I was on a golf buggy was in 2017, when we were in Hamilton Island for Chris’s cousin’s wedding. Then, I didn’t have to worry about a baby or a stroller, as it was just the two of us. With Kaia, being on a golf buggy would definitely be a bit different. We had left the baby carrier to strap on me in the car back at the ferry station parking lot, so I knew I’d have to hold her tightly while on the golf buggy. In the beginning, she whined a bit being held down, but when she realized we were moving and going up and down bumps, she calmed down and started to enjoy the ride. All I have to say is: it’s a good thing she’s 1.5 years old and more sturdy now. I’m not totally sure how I would have felt if we had done a trip like this a year ago without the baby carrier to strap her into!

Today, we crossed the state border from Quintana Roo and entered Yucatan, the state of Mexico famous for the Yucatecan Mayan archeological site Chichen Itza. Once upon a time when Chichen Itza was fully open to the public, you could climb the very steep stairs up the main Temple of Kulkulcan. Unfortunately, we learned from our guide that since 2006, the temple steps have permanently closed, and no one is allowed to go up. A sad event led to this closure: an 80-year old woman climbed up the steep steps, only to fall all the way down during her descent. There’s definitely a sense of vertigo on steps that steep, and given how high it was, and the vibrations and echoes you hear in the complex…. her fall would have been quite brutal, not just for her, but for literally everyone else there who could hear the fall.

Initially, I was a little disappointed to hear that we couldn’t climb up. The first time I visited Mexico City, I went to visit the famous Teotihuacan Aztec site, and I remember climbing up the steep steps of the temples there. I had a lot of vertigo climbing down the steps and remember thinking how much more challenging it would be if I had to carry something (or someone!) down with me. But it was really enjoyable to have that experience of being at the top and envisioning what it would have been like to be a part of this ancient civilization from so long ago. Given we had Kaia with us, plus our stroller, I didn’t really care much about this after I thought about it. It just would have been a lot more nerve racking and scary in our case with a baby, or we’d just have to go up and down one at a time while the other stayed on the ground with her.

On our way there, Chris missed the sign that would have expedited our drive to Chichen Itza, so while we added some time to our trip there, we reduced the cost of the trip, as there are road tolls, and they are quite steep (and apply both to and from). On our way back, though, we miscalculated how much cash in pesos we had in my wallet. When we got to the toll booth, I was a little bit worried because when I counted the cash, we had approximately 20 pesos (just over $1 USD) less than what the toll sign said (the toll was 385 pesos; we had about 365). When Chris told the toll booth worker that this was all we had in cash, she told us to move the car to the side of the road; she was not going to let us through. I tried to ask if we could use credit card, but they didn’t accept them, nor did they accept U.S. dollars. After about five minutes of waiting, another worker came up to us to ask if we had U.S. dollars. We didn’t realize this at the time, but they weren’t going to accept them. They were going to ask if ANOTHER car had change for the U.S. dollars in pesos. We didn’t realize what was happening until another car gestured towards us, paid a toll, and sped away, and the worker explained that we could go through and didn’t have to give them any cash at all. So…. THAT RANDOM CAR was so kind and generous and ended up paying our entire toll (that’s about $21.94 USD), not just the tiny $1 amount we didn’t have! They must have taken pity on us because they saw our baby in the backseat. We didn’t even get a chance to thank them for their generosity and altruism given they had already driven off so quickly. All they gave us was a small smile, no words, before speeding off.

It’s easy to forget with all the horrible news, the Reddit rants, the parent group complaints about spouses, parents, in-laws, friends, and nannies, but friendly, generous, kind, selfless people are all over the world. These are people who do a lot for others, even complete strangers, and expect absolutely nothing in return… not even a thanks. It’s in moments like these when I am reminded of that, and it’s a reminder to me to also pay it forward to others.

Today was our first full day in Cancun. After a long day of delays and a rescheduled flight yesterday, it was nice to be able to finally be at the hotel and be out and about at our destination. In the afternoon, we went to Isla Blanca, a beach that’s a bit out of the main hotel zone of Cancun, so that we could experience a slightly more “locals” experience of the beach, as well as fewer people. But when we got there, we realized that the car was not going to make it on the fully sandy roads. So we ended up parking it and walking a bit to reach the actual beach.

While the beach did have a bit of the dreaded sargassum, the invasive seaweed that has been overtaking beaches in Caribbean and especially in Quintana Roo/around the Gulf of Mexico (thanks to human-created climate change – what joy!), the water was extremely clear and warm; it was shallow for quite a long ways out, and there were barely any waves. This made it easy to take Kaia out in the water without any fear, especially given she got so upset while at the beach in Byron Bay after that big wave went over us in December. After some time in the water, we sat together on the sand and built a sand castle. Okay, well, when I say we built a sand castle, what I really mean is… I tried to build one (complete with a moat! A proper castle needs a moat!), and she kept trying to topple it. We did our usual routine. And given I wanted us to be close to the waves for a water source for the moat, what was unknown to me at the time was that… each time a wave washed into our area, it also gradually swept more and more sand into swimsuit, and thus into my butt.

The car rental company warned Chris (given that we are in Cancun) to not get excessive sand in the car, so I got a little paranoid when I realized how much sand got stuck in my suit, plus literally in every possible crevice of Kaia. It was as though every single time I lifted her arm or moved a diaper flap or wiped another tiny roll in her neck that I was uncovering more and more sand. And each time I patted myself off of sand, more and more sand kept falling off me! Chris even tried to snap photos of my trying to take out these massive clumps of sand from my butt!

Anyway, we had to do quite a big clean out of sand not only directly from our bodies, but also from the seats in the car and the floor, which took quite a bit of time. It was in these moments that it suddenly hit me: now I completely understand why parents of young children travel to resorts and stay on the resorts. On resort properties, cleanup like this is easy, there are sprays and showers everywhere for you to easily hose off, and you never have to worry about things like getting too much sand in your rental car and potentially getting fined. This was annoying, but I still think it was worth going to a local beach and having that experience together.

We were told by many other parents that we shouldn’t be concerned that Kaia learned to walk at 16.5 months and not earlier. “You should enjoy it! You will be so tired chasing her while running around! Be happy that she can be contained for a bit longer!” Chris kept on calling her “defective” and asking her when she was going to walk, half joking. Honestly, while I was a little concerned and didn’t push back on the early intervention suggestion by the doctor at her 16-month checkup, I did know that once she became more mobile, I’d get more exhausted more quickly while traveling.

And that is definitely right. After having our first connecting flight from JFK to Miami delayed, which would have resulted in our connecting flight to Cancun being missed, I had to get in line to get our second flight rebooked. We spent some unplanned time at the AA lounge in Miami and ended up arriving in Cancun several hours after our original scheduled arrival time, so Wednesday was completely gone. We ended up eating at a sports bar restaurant at the resort before going to bed. But while at the lounge, Kaia kept wanting to wander everywhere, all the time. She was walking into people transiting in busy hallways, through people’s luggage. I had to keep running up to her and grabbing her to prevent someone from tripping over her or her knocking over someone else’s belongings. Luckily for the most part, people were quite amused and thought she was just the cutest. We got endless compliments about how cute and pretty she is, plus how sweet she is walking.

Of course, she looks precious and sweet when she’s wandering around like a tiny robot, unsure of what to do with her arms, so she usually has them sticking out in front of her. But then, when you try to hold her hand to walk the way you want her to walk, or you pick her up when she’s determined to keep going where she wants, she flips out and throws a toddler tantrum. And then, I have to to do *that mom thing* and hold her in football hold under one arm, otherwise she will squirm her way out of my grip and fall and hurt herself.

Parents always judge each other. They give endless crap and judgment to parents who use leashes, saying it’s inhumane, and babies aren’t dogs. But honestly, when I first heard of parents doing this and making these purchases on Amazon, I had little judgment. In fact, I thought it was kind of hilarious and quite safe, a solution to all of parents’ worst worries with their rambunctious little ones, discovering that they could “go” where they wanted whenever they wanted… if they wanted. What would you rather happen: a parent leash their unwieldy, stubborn child at the wrist, or the child running loose and getting hit by a bike or car?

The last few times we packed for trips, it was quite the doozy. There was packing for the three of us, but then there were also things like packing all of Kaia’s bottles, bottle cleaning supplies; her diaper bag; diapers and wipes; my pump and pump parts in its own bag; a separate bag just to store breast milk. It was alway a little stressful, especially when I’d wonder if I’d forgotten something. In the end, I never did, but in general, the more there is to pack, and the more bags you have, the more stressful it can be.

This time is the first time since Kaia was born that I don’t have to worry about packing bottles, pump or pump parts, or a separate bag to store breast milk; I’m FREE of all of that! So while Chris initially suggested we check a bag, he also suggested that I first pack everything to see how much stuff we actually needed, then to see if the checked luggage was even necessary. Miraculously, I somehow got everything to fit into one carry-on roller bag, plus my backpack. But I am still getting a little paranoid, wondering if there is something I may have totally overlooked…? This is what happens to your brain when you are so used to having so many items and at least one checked bag every time you travel on a plane with a baby.

In the last week, I finally started doing some deeper research on what we should see and eat while in Quintana Roo, Mexico. The last few months have dragged a bit, so I didn’t have a lot of motivation to plan and research where to eat and what to see. I totally get why so many parents of young children just go to all-inclusive resorts: it takes all the thinking and planning out of a vacation, which can also be a source of stress in itself. And when you have a young baby or toddler, they tend to take up a lot of your energy and free time. It can be all consuming.

But we’re not really resort people, though, so while we will enjoy the amenities of a resort, the lounges, or the breakfast buffets, we tend to get bored staying at one place all day long. I don’t remember a time when I’ve ever just sat by a pool or at the beach and read… Except when I was at Santa Barbara’s Ritz Carlton for President’s Club, and that was because I was by myself, and I had no motivation to leave the resort unless it was a pre-arranged trip.

I’m looking forward to exploring Yucatecan cuisine, in addition to the local cuisine of Quintana Roo. Most people don’t realize that Mexican cuisine is quite complex and diverse, and it’s not just tacos and quesadillas in this country… though those are very delicious things.

And just two days after a company layoff, 400 of my US based colleagues and I all few to Denver for our annual sales and success kickoff — the very first one happening in person since pre-pandemic. It’s the first one I’ve been in person for: the first one was virtual, where I actually was an MC; the second one was last year, when I was out on maternity leave; and this is the third one. This September will mark three years with my company. It’s strange how time flies… and during all that time, this is the very first time I’m meeting so many colleagues in person for the first time.

A travel agent helped make all of our travel arrangements to and from Denver, from flights, hotels, to airport transfers. Although I got put in an “American Airlines” flight, it was actually a Jetblue flight due to their partnership. And since someone else did the booking for me, I didn’t even have a seat assignment until I called AA after the flight was booked to request one. All the window and aisle seats were booked in the front of the plane, so to be as far forward as possible, I opted for seat 8B…. yes, that’s a middle seat. I cannot even remember the last time I sat in the middle. But this was a class-less plane, and I knew having a seat in row 8 would pay off because I’d get off the plane faster. It actually wasn’t that bad, either, and Jetblue was a decent flying experience overall: they honored my AA elite status by allowing me to board first with Jetblue Mosaic status fliers. They gave me free snacks (plantain chips!), a screen per seat with a really good selection of movies and TV shows, plus charging outlets. The charging outlets were especially helpful because my phone battery is especially sad right now, so I pretty much had it charging the entire 4 hour-20 minute flight. Did I think it was weird that they offered earbuds and blankets for a fee? Yes, but I guess that’s how they make money, so why not? I happened to have earbuds to plug in from a long-ago AA flight when they used to pass them out for free in business class. It’s a good thing I saved them in my travel bag because they finally came handy!

Whether we have been aware of it or not this whole time, Kaia has been an amazing sleeper. She was pretty much sleeping through the night, in her bassinet or crib, at around 3 months of age. She’d been a great eater. She is generally always jovial, curious, and in a good mood. We’ve had a relatively smooth experience as parents to date, and we’ve been extremely lucky and grateful for it. However, during the few nights we were in Orange County at a hotel, she refused to sleep in her pack and play, and instead, we let her sleep on top of our bed between us. We needed her to sleep. We needed to sleep. So we just let it happen and hoped it would be temporary.

Well, we are back now, and she refuses to sleep in the crib. It’s likely separation anxiety related, but it doesn’t matter how tired she is or how late it is. She will NOT sleep in the crib. She either needs to be on the bed with us or in our lap/on our chests. And the nanny is not pleased with us, as she just came back today to help us adjust back.

“This is not the Kaia I let you go to Australia with,” the nanny said sternly to us. “What happened to my Kaia who always sleeps and naps well…?!”

Well, I guess this is a rude awakening to what a baby sleep regression can look like!

In previous trips to Southern California, we’d always flown in and out of LAX since it seemed like it was the most direct way to get there. But Chris found out that there actually was a direct flight from Orange County (via Santa Ana) to JFK once a day, and so he booked our return flights to New York via Orange County. This gave us more time to explore in further depth the Orange County area and places we had not yet seen much of. You could truly spend years exploring Orange County and never get through it, but this segment of our trip gave us more time to do so.

I already knew that Orange County had a big Central/South American and Vietnamese/Filipino population, but I was unaware before doing a quick search on Google that Anaheim is actually known for having an area called Little Arabia. Most people who are aware of Anaheim know that it is home to Disneyland California. Little Arabia would be news to most people, though, even those who are local to Southern California.

Earlier this week, we ate at an Iraqi restaurant that had delicious kebabs, tender, fall-off-the-bone lamb shank, and even an interesting grape soda we’d never tried before. We stopped by a Syrian bakery that had plenty of Western and Middle Eastern sweets, but a hidden item on the menu was bouza ice cream, similar to Turkish dondurma ice cream in its chewy/stretchy texture, which it gets from mastik and orchid flour. When you order it, it’s churned to order and rolled with ground pistachios. It was super stretchy and fragrant of rose water. Our last stop in this area was a Palestinian bakery, where we had cream kanefe (the first cream version we’d ever had, and not too sweet!) along with Turkish coffee, and a delicious spiced and sweetened milk tea, fragrant from caradmom and cloves. The coffee and tea were made to order and with a lot of care from the owner of the bakery, who was extremely warm and hospitable. All were in strip malls, so very much a classic SoCal experience.

We could spend ages exploring SoCal for all its delicious ethnic food and never get through it all. But at least we had a good taste of it, though brief, this segment of our trip.

Most people who have interacted with us while traveling with Kaia have been extremely kind, friendly, and praised Kaia for how well-behaved she’s been on flights. She’s been told how sweet and cute she is, how well she has slept, how good she’s been. It’s been glowing reviews all around, and I don’t say that just because I am her mother; I say that because I have also been shocked at her behavior and how she’s handled so many changes, as well as how nice people have been to us, cheering us on and encouraging us. So many kind strangers have expressed empathy to us and insisted we’ve been doing a great job managing. It’s been quite heartening to experience.

Well, the first rude couple encountered us on our flight from MEL > LAX. They wanted to sit together and away from the baby (yeah, maybe 5 feet more away…), and they asked if Chris could swap seats with the wife sitting next to me (my seat is where the bassinet is set up). When we declined their offer (TWICE), the wife kept making passive aggressive remarks to me, saying, “it’s going to be disruptive for me, yeah? The baby will be making noises and disturbing me, and that’s not quite right, yeah?”

Actually, not “yeah.” My husband and I paid for these fucking seats in business class, so stay the fuck away from me and my baby, you entitled, overprivileged twat.

Then, the husband tried to complain to a flight attendant, which then prompted her to go to Chris to ask him to move. And of course, Chris responded with something along the lines of, “I don’t care what other people want!”

They lost, and we won. And well, Kaia was actually quite quiet throughout the whole flight, with a few small outbursts, and that was it. Part of me wishes she was a bit more disruptive just to piss off the woman and her husband, but then that would have been disruptive for us, too.