High protein everything

One thing I’ve done to address my weight issue is to see if I can consume more protein. I’ve already been adding a protein supplement to my midday smoothie, along with additional flaxseed, hemp seeds, and yogurt. But I’m trying to figure out how to get more plant-based protein into my diet without feeling like a rabbit. And so I found this interesting “high protein peanut noodles” recipe that takes a whole block of silken tofu and blends it into a sauce with peanut butter, soy sauce, garlic, ginger, chili paste, and other ingredients to create something that is not only high protein but also delicious and satisfying. I was actually shocked with how much I liked it: I was licking the spoons clean.

I liked this sauce so much that I sent it to my friend, who is also exercise and health obsessed. And she was so excited about it that she decided she would make it for dinner tonight!

Feeling 40 in my midsection

Now that it’s been over a month since I turned 40, it’s almost like I have little things here and there to remind me of my age. I just scheduled (and rescheduled, due to this week’s blizzard) my first mammogram. I also realize that as I am checking my weight on the scale weekly that my weight really hasn’t come down much from when we first got back from Australia and the Philippines. Usually, this is what happens each year: the second week of December, we leave for Australia/Asia. We’re gone for about three to four weeks, during which time, I do no real exercise (my workouts are all on hold) other than casual walking (which frankly, I do not think is enough for anyone at any age). In Australia, we’re always getting to places by car, which means even fewer steps. And I’m definitely indulging more since we’re away from home, we’re trying new places in different cities, and it’s Christmas time, so ’tis the season for indulging. So with all that lack of movement and increase in indulgent foods, it’s no wonder that by the time we get back to New York the first week of January that I’ve usually gained somewhere in the ballpark of six to nine pounds. And since my baseline weight is at about 117 pounds, percentage wise, that’s actually a good amount of weight for me to gain on my 5’3″ frame. So I spend the next month to month and a half cutting back on indulging, not drinking much alcohol at all, and also increasing the rigor of my exercises.

I checked the scale last week, and I checked it again today. My weight is not budging much. I came back at 125 pounds, and today, I am 124 pounds. I’ve lost a single pound of weight. It’s fluctuated down to 120 at some point in early February, but it’s gone back up again. And I am definitely not pleased. And I know where most of it is concentrated: excess fat right in my midsection, the area they always tell you that as you get older, you need to watch more carefully.

So now I’ve become one of those people who checks her weight semi regularly and is trying to figure out how to lose weight. This is all relative to myself, and most people cannot even tell from looking at me that I’ve gained weight. But because I know and can feel the difference, I suppose it’s time to start making some age-related tweaks to address this — not fun.

Bánh bột lọc: a labor-intensive, finicky, and annoying dish

Bánh bột lọc, a Central Vietnamese (Hue) specialty, is a tapioca dumpling, usually wrapped and steamed in banana leaves, stuffed with seasoned shrimp, pork, and sometimes mushrooms. My mom introduced these to me as a kid, but it was very rare to find them even at Vietnamese restaurants and bakeries in San Jose because these dumplings are so laborious and annoying to make. The “annoying” part is due to the tapioca starch: unlike using glutinous or regular rice flour doughs, tapioca starch is extremely, extremely finicky and difficult to manage. Sometimes, it can feel like liquid sand in your hands, and it’s hard to get the texture just right so that you can actually knead and shape it properly. But it’s imperative that you get it to a bread dough-like stage, otherwise shaping it will be a nightmare.

The last time I remember having these tapioca dumplings was probably over 12 years ago. My mom met and befriended a Vietnamese woman who had an underground Vietnamese catering business. This talented lady made all the Vietnamese dishes we love that require so much effort, dishes like banh uot, banh cuon, banh it tran, and bánh bột lọc. My mom did a massive bulk order of banh bot loc, knowing that I’d be home. And then, she sent me back to New York with a big bag of banh bot loc, all individually wrapped in banana leaves. She ordered me to store them in my freezer and pop however many out for Chris and me, and to then steam them to eat. “And don’t forget the nuoc cham!” she said, before I went back to New York.

So I decided that for my Lunar New Year party this year, I’d finally attempt making bánh bột lọc. I always have banana leaves in the freezer. I just thawed the shrimp. And I had tapioca starch. I was always up for a challenge, right? And well, this was certainly a challenge.. and a real mess. The tapioca starch dough was so finicky and infuriating. But when I finally got it, I was on a roll. A few of the dumplings I rolled with banana leaves had errors, resulting in the “dough” oozing out of the leaves like liquid. So I promptly steamed my “mistake” dumplings to see how the texture and flavor turned out. And I was shocked: even the “mistake” bánh bột lọc looked decent, and the flavor and texture were spot on! The flavor was savory and briny; the texture was nice and chewy, just as tapioca should be.

My mom doesn’t really like that I love cooking, especially laborious, intense projects like bánh bột lọc. She will likely get annoyed when I tell her that I already made a batch of these, and it’s currently sitting in my freezer, waiting to be steamed. But I hope she realizes that it’s one tiny way that I try to keep her culture alive.

Vietnamese handmade delicacies

Of all the types of cuisines I like and cook semi-regularly, I probably make far less Vietnamese food than I’d ideally want to have at home. A big reason for that is most of the Vietnamese dishes I absolutely love are pretty laborious. No one is whipping up banh xeo on a weeknight for a casual dinner. And if you want to enjoy central Vietnamese delicacies like banh it tran (sticky rice dumplings stuffed with mashed mung bean, minced pork, and shrimp), or banh beo (steamed bite-sized rice cakes topped with shrimp) — well, that’s going to be a whole weekend affair, with their multi-step process. These dishes are so frustrating because they are so time-consuming and laborious to make, yet they are eaten in mere seconds. The people who eat these dishes do not always understand or appreciate how much love, effort, and skill goes into making these tasty delights.

While enjoying the banh chung from Banh NYC restaurant the last couple days, I watched as both Kaia and Chris excitedly ate their portions. Kaia had her happy drool face on when we put the banh chung, still in its steamy banana leaves, in front of her. Banh chung is a dish that requires a lot of steps, a lot of patience, and a lot of skill. There is required skill for each step, whether that’s soaking the rice or soaking, steaming, mashing, and seasoning the mung beans, or preparing and marinating the pork. But there’s also skill that your hands just need to *know* to wrap and fold the leaves just so, so that the final steamed package is this perfect square. I attempted the tying of the string at the Tet Lunar New Year event hosted by VHC a couple weeks ago; that was super hard! I messed up twice and then finally gave it to our volunteer workshop instructor to help me fix my wrongs. This is one of those dishes I don’t even bother attempting to make; I leave this to the pros. But maybe there would be value in attempting it as a cooking project once or twice, just to see if I could do it. Dishes like these are slowly but surely becoming a lost art. For our Lunar New Year party this year, ‘m thinking about making banh bot loc, which are bite-sized shrimp/pork tapioca dumplings, individually wrapped and steamed in banana leaves. The last time I ate these was when my mom found a Vietnamese home caterer, and she did a private order of these little chewy babies; she even sent me back to New York with some to store in our freezer so that I could steam them for future meals. While AI takes over the world, what it will never be able to do is replace the love and art that goes into crafting special dishes like banh bot loc or banh chung. That really needs a real human touch — even if Chris debates that because he likes to troll my obsession with handmade, homemade things all the time.

Homemade milk bread rolls

Several months ago, I successfully made a loaf of Japanese milk bread. I originally attempted this during the pandemic, but I didn’t have bread flour and only had all-purpose, and the bread was completely wrong — not the fluffy, airy, super moist bread that you think of when you hear of Japanese milk bread. When I finally attempted it again last year and succeeded, I knew I had to make this bread more often. It’s so satisfying to make, and as long as you have the right ingredients (as in, bread flour for higher gluten development, dry milk powder, and instant yeast as opposed to dry active yeast), then it’s pretty much fool-proof. While cooking and baking (desserts) have always been fun and satisfying for me, baking yeast breads has a whole different level of satisfaction for me. I love every part of the process — measuring out the ingredients, mixing and kneading the dough, watching the two rises, and baking. I look at every bread I’ve made as though it were my little baby — being made, grown, and developed. Tonight, I baked up the milk bread rolls after mixing and kneading the dough last night. I started mixing after I put Kaia to bed last night. She knew I was in the kitchen and kept calling out to me.

“Whatcha doing, mama?” she called out from her bed. “Are you cooking?”

I went back to her bed to settle her down and try to get her to close her eyes. “Mama is making bread, baby!” I said to her. “If you’re good, then maybe you can have some when it’s ready!”

Kaia loves “soft bread.” She loves to remind me of this. When she says this, she means that she loves soft, fluffy bread with a tender crumb — brioche, challah, and milk bread are all in this category. She also does not like a crunchy toast the way I do. Are these the most nutritious breads? No. But they are deeply satisfying to make and eat. And I always get excited whenever my baby enjoys anything I make with my own hands.

Speaking of nutrition, though, I was thinking about this recipe developer/cookbook author I follow and love, who is currently pregnant and was diagnosed early on with gestational diabetes. While I’m sure this was frustrating for her as someone who loves food, one interesting thing she shared was that when she bakes her own bread from scratch, her blood sugar levels do not spike. But when she eats bread not made by her (so bought outside), her blood sugar goes crazy. If you know of anyone or have yourself had gestational diabetes, you’ll know that in dealing with this during pregnancy, you have to prick yourself at least once or twice every day and carefully monitor your blood sugar level to ensure it doesn’t go over a certain amount. So when I heard that homemade bread didn’t spike her blood sugar, I felt a bit better about my love of making these “soft breads” that are not made from whole wheat or whole grain flours. Though i will say openly that I do do slightly sacrilegious things and add whole wheat flour to my brioche and challah to increase the nutritional profile.

Georgian cooking class at Red Inside Culinary

Last night, I attended a Georgian cooking class at Red Inside Culinary, a cozy little cooking school kitchen in the West Village. Chris had gifted me the class as a Christmas gift, so this was already scheduled long in advance. I was really looking forward to it since I’d never before made anything Georgian or from that region of the world, so this would definitely be new territory for me.

As soon as I walked in, I was already liking this far better than the cooking class/school he gifted me last year: there was a large kitchen with ample counter space, a separate food prep area, and a beautifully appointed dining table that felt super cozy, like it could be someone’s real and quaint dining room in the middle of the hustle and bustle of the West Village. The chef/teacher, Dona, who was born and raised in Georgia, had done her due diligence with food prep and arrangement. She emphasized constantly that food prep and “mise en place” were integral in making sure you were managing time well and had food ready by a certain time; you can’t really afford to not be on time if you were serving a meal at a set time, whether that’s to guests at home or to paying guests in a restaurant. She was also just very friendly, bubbly, and energetic, which is what everyone wants in a cooking instructor. I also loved that this class had just six people in it, so it was easy for everyone to talk openly and get to know each other. Everyone got to participate in making all components of the planned dishes, and we also ate and left in a timely manner (we were all out of there just after 9pm and finished eating by 8:30pm!).

I officially learned a few things about Georgian cooking that I’d guessed before based on the many Georgian meals I’d previously enjoyed, but now it was coming straight from a Georgian: the three key ingredients in Georgian cooking are 1) pomegranates, 2) walnuts, and 3) grapes. Though I would also argue that what really *made* our spinach balls (pkhali) and walnut pesto stuffed eggplant rolls (nigvziani badrijani) were the spices we used, which included an interesting spicy red salt mix I’d never heard of, blue fenugreek (which, Dona was quick to point out, is not the same as Indian fenugreek; it smells nothing like it, either!), plus a Georgian spice blend called khmeli suneli that she typically just picks up when she goes back to Georgia (she said we could now find them in Kalustyan’s, just that it would be far more expensive). The eggplant rolls and spinach balls we made were so delicious; I ate way more of them than I thought I would and easily could have just eaten those and been fully satisfied. They were also extremely easy to make — as long as you had the right ingredients. I may need to go on a search for this khmeli suneli spice blend and add it to my endless spices just to get the pleasure of making this myself at home.

We also made khachapuri (Georgian open cheese bread, often times called boat bread), imeruli (the “closed” version of Georgian cheese bread), roasted cornish hens with a silky, luxurious garlic sauce, and a concord grape granita topped with crushed, salted, and toasted pistachios. It was all so simple, but so delicious. And it tasted even better with two different Georgian red wines, one sweet and one dry. All of these dishes would be easy for me to replicate at home. Now, I just need the recipes and that khmeli suneli spice blend to make this all happen!

The necessity of soup at the Chinese dining table: an ode to my paternal grandma

Growing up, I remember there was almost always a massive stockpot full of some kind of broth or soup on the stove. Sometimes, it was a gentle herbal chicken soup. Occasionally, it was a thick and packed jook/congee with lots of different proteins, like chicken, pork, tofu skins, shredded dried and rehydrated scallops. Other times, it was a ginseng-based tonic meant to “cool” our bodies from eating too many rich foods. Regardless of what was in the big pot, I grew up knowing that soup was an integral part of our diet at home. It was rare to have a day when there was no full stockpot on the stove. It was an everyday occurrence to hear my grandma, mom, or aunt insist that Ed and I “drink soup.”

Soup was the antidote to everything. You ate too much fried food? Drink soup. You aren’t feeling well? Drink soup. You’re feeling sluggish or tired? Drink soup. Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) has a soup or tonic for pretty much anything you can complain about.

I started getting back into thinking about soup more regularly after I gave birth to Kaia in December 2021. My aunt had lovingly sent me ingredients to make a specific Chinese chicken wine soup (雞酒湯 ji jiu tang), which she insisted would nourish my body to recover quickly from childbirth, while also simultaneously helping my body to produce more milk for my baby (debatable, but it was still tasty). Two years ago, I started being more intentional about making soup. And this year, I am trying to make soup even more often. It’s delicious, nourishing, tasty, and given it’s been so cold this winter, who could say no to a hot bowl of soup? Soup rounds out any meal. In China, there is a saying called san cai yi tang (三菜一汤), meaning “three dishes and one soup,” which is a foundational principle of a balanced, home-cooked Chinese meal that is meant to be shared. It’s typically a meat/protein, one vegetable, one tofu/egg/seafood dish, alongside a nutritious soup. The soup type can vary depending on how it complements the other dishes at the table, but more often than not at home, the soup is a very simple broth that is lightly flavored and seasoned.

I made a simple home-style soup today called yuanzi tang (圆子汤), or pork meatball soup. I was inspired to make it because this blog post by Xueci Cheng, a recipe developer I follow, talked about how integral soup was to her family’s meals in Sichuan growing up. It reminded me of how I ate with my family growing up. And similar to me, she also had forgotten how soup was always at the dinner table at home, as she had moved away to Germany, and soup had mostly been forgotten as a thing to have at a meal. So she made this same soup, and she said when her parents made it for them all during their visit to see her in Germany, they immediately said at the first sip once it was finished cooking that it “tasted like home 家的味道.” This soup is really simple. There’s no required broth base, as it’s mostly flavored by the fat and flavor from the pork meatballs you make (though I did use a cup of dashi I happened to have in my fridge). But after I seasoned it, it really did remind me of the simpler, light home-style soups my grandma used to make when I was little.

My paternal grandma passed in 1995. If she were alive today, she’d be 109 going on 110 this September. Her only granddaughter just turned 40 last month — that’s me. I wonder how she’d feel knowing that even 31 years after her death that I still think about her and her cooking often. I wonder if she’d be pleased to know how much of an impact she’s had on my life and the way I view food, cooking, and our shared culture. She never thought cooking was that great of a skill; for her, it was just something she knew and did. It fed her family (and around Lunar New Year, it fed her friends), and that was enough for her. But in these moments when I taste things that remind me of her and her cooking, I do find myself missing her and wishing we could share that same taste together.

Cantonese style beef stew with daikon and tofu skin 萝卜腐竹牛腩

Growing up in a Cantonese household and with a Cantonese paternal grandma, I was exposed to endless Cantonese delicacies and dishes that I am sad to say, I oftentimes have forgotten about. Some dishes, like Cantonese dim sum, zongzi, or wonton mein have stayed with me as staples in my current eating life. Others have completely disappeared from my consciousness. But then I occasionally get reminded of dishes my grandma either used to make herself or would order out when we went to restaurants, whether that is through seeing pictures and videos on social media or by looking at restaurant menus, and then I am taken back to those delicious moments of food discovery and appreciation.

One of the dishes my grandma never made at home, but my dad always loved ordering for lunch at casual Cantonese restaurants, was Cantonese style beef stew, usually served in a claypot with rice, and almost always with braised daikon. Occasionally, some restaurants would add tofu skins to their stew, but many just had different cuts of beef stew and tendon with a generous sprinkling of bok choy, and always with copious amounts of steamed rice to sop up all the delicious, umami beef stew juices. The stew was always extremely fragrant of five spice powder and star anise. It was comfort food for my dad, and then eventually it became comfort food for me. I rarely order it as an adult, as when I go to Cantonese restaurants, it really hasn’t been top of mind. But occasionally, I will get beef stew as a topping on my wonton mein, or as a small side when ordering takeout. Most places I tried were a bit disappointing — something was lacking, or the quantity of food I got was just too tiny. So I was really happy to find some recipes for this dish developed by recipe developers I follow that made me realize how easy it is to make at home with a little time. Other than the beef stew meat and daikon, I usually have all the other ingredients ready in my pantry, so this recipe was beckoning me to make it! So I “gave it a go” yesterday, and the result far exceeded any version I’ve had in New York to date! Variations of this will be on rotation in our home moving forward. Chris ate some and declared it “not bad, pretty good,” which is his version of a glowing compliment. Kaia did not say anything about the stew, but she did quickly and eagerly eat all the beef stew pieces from her plate during dinner time tonight!

Eating out is never quite the same when you’re a maniacal home cook

Yesterday during our play date lunch, I chose a general Thai place that was walking distance from Dumbo Space Club because I wanted something that was walking distance and also had enough space to accommodate six of us. It would definitely not be a place I’d choose if it was for me, or for me, Chris, and Kaia, but I figured it would have something for everyone at the table. One of the moms chose a green curry with chicken, which I probably would not have ordered since I just made green curry last week and really liked it. When the green curry came to the table, I already had a feeling I wasn’t going to love it: it was more white in color and not very green at all. The chicken used was just white meat (ugh, less flavor and far less moist), and there was basically very little flavor other than coconut milk in it. This green curry made me sad because it wasn’t anywhere as vibrant as the green curry I had made earlier this week (with the best tips from Pailin from Hot Thai Kitchen!!), and of course, it wasn’t zippy or spicy in the way my homemade green curry was. In fact, I don’t think I can ever order green curry at a restaurant ever again because I know exactly how to make it just the way I want it at home.

I shared this with my friend who cooks a lot, and she told me she feels exactly the same way. And funnily enough, she also had the exact same experience with green curry at a lunch recently with another friend.

“I didn’t want to sound like an ass to (my friend), but that curry was so bland and boring,” she told me. “My curry at home was a hundred times better! It’s just the truth!”

Usually when I order food out, I want it to be food that is not food I know how to make and make well at home, or using ingredients that I don’t easily have access to, or that is so laborious that I just have to leave it to the experts. The other moms enjoyed the green curry, and I’m happy they did. But I’d never willingly order this dish at a restaurant ever again.

So much chicken stock, what to do?

“This fridge is packed!” Chris said earlier this week after opening our fridge and inspecting the contents. “Are these all just ingredients, or is this stuff we can actually eat?”

Our fridge usually has a lot of food in it, but oftentimes, it’s mostly raw fruit and vegetables, condiments and sauces (homemade and store-bought), different milks, yogurt, and Chris’s stockpiling of kombucha. This week, though, since I just emptied out my vegetable scrap and bone bag from the freezer, we have a lot of jars of my homemade, gelatinous stock, aka bone broth. I can assure you that this is most definitely “bone broth” — it jiggles with so much collagen that it’s almost like jell-o after cooled in the fridge.

I originally was going to use the bulk of it for a butternut squash green curry soup, but then Chris insisted that we have chicken green curry this week, and I didn’t want to double up on the green curry flavorings because it would be redundant. I had to noodle around in my endless recipe bookmarks to come up with inspiration because I couldn’t readily come up with any ideas on my own that would be simple. Since I am trying to use up what we have and not buy anything net-new unless it’s a fruit or vegetable given our remaining time here in 2025 is so limited, I need to focus on what I already have, whether it’s in the fridge, freezer, or pantry. So I decided to pivot to something lighter and quicker: Vietnamese butternut squash soup with ground pork, also known as canh bi do nau thit bam. More traditionally, the squash would be kabocha, but I just cut up my big 4.5-pound butternut squash, so I used that. I defrosted a bit of ground pork and tossed that in with aromatics before adding the butternut squash cubes and the gelatinous stock. I guess what really makes this “Vietnamese” is that it’s seasoned with fish sauce and then finished with chopped cilantro, and a lot of it.

The art and appreciation of cooking seems to be dying in my generation. People like my friend in New Jersey and I are like rare breeds. We value homemade, from scratch, from source foods. We view the time we invest into cooking as time invested in our overall health, well-being, and happiness. We don’t look at ready-made or restaurant food as better or superior. This soup is humble, but it’s satisfying, tasty, and homely. We need more of this kind of dish in our lives.