Category Archives: Contemplations on New York Life

Americans need a Slip, Slop, Slap! campaign to protect themselves from the sun year round because they are failing at sun protection

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The first half of this week, it’s going to be quite the scorcher here in New York City. We’re seeing temperatures ranging from 92-98 degrees F, so we’ll all likely be finding reasons to stay indoors and blast our AC units (and drive up our Con Edison bills annoyingly). I took a short walk before hopping on a train slightly south of where we live to get some extra steps in. I took a yellow train to get down to Chinatown to pick up Pookster from summer camp this late afternoon. Everywhere I walked, whether it was around Columbus Circle, Times Square, SoHo, or Chinatown, I saw people sunburnt. Men with receding hairlines had the tops of their heads cherry red. I saw multiple men and women of various skin tones burnt on their cheeks, noses, shoulders, chests, and upper backs. It was pretty infuriating to see that people were not doing their due diligence to protect themselves from the sun.

The thing that bothers me pretty much every May as Memorial Day and summer grow closer here in the Northern Hemisphere is that most Americans seem to think that you only need to apply sunscreen… DURING THE SUMMER. If you walk into any Duane Reade or CVS or equivalent, you see all the sunscreen bottles front and center when you walk in. Sales go on at stores for sunscreen. It’s as though the concept of sunscreen is just for summer, and irrelevant any other time of the year. This is absolutely NOT TRUE AT ALL. The sun is shining its powerful rays onto your skin, eyes, and hair every single day, cloudy or not cloudy, and thus putting you at risk of premature wrinkles, sun spots, sun burn, and potentially even skin cancer. It’s even getting to you when you are indoors, assuming where you are has windows, because it’s shining through windows, plus you’re still getting exposed to indirect sunlight! Most people here do not think about applying sunscreen when it’s cloudy or not summer. It’s actually pretty scary how misinformed the average American is about the dangers of sun exposure.

Here in the U.S., we could do with a little lesson from our Southern Hemisphere friends in Australia. The Australian Cancer Council has a SunSmart campaign that’s stuck with our Down Under neighbors in a pretty simple slogan: Slip, Slop, Slap, (Seek, Slide). The first three S’s are seen on signs pretty frequently when you are walking around shops, storefronts, and beaches in Australia. They refer to Slip (on a cover for your skin, like sleeves or long pants), Slop (on high SPF sunscreen, and reapply when in the water, sweating, or every 2-4 hours if outside), Slap (on a wide-brimmed hat); the last two refer to Seek(ing shade/cover when possible) and Slide(ing on sunglasses to protect your eyes).

I was thinking about this slogan while also remembering Chris’s dad’s semi-frequent comment when he comes to visit us in the States every spring. Chris’s parents are very religious with wearing hats outside and seeking shade. Many times while going out, he will take a look at (who we assume are) Americans around us, and he will ask if Americans just don’t wear hats that often. And well, he’s kind of right: on any day here, regardless of what season it is, (and actually especially during the summer), the people who are walking the streets of New York wearing hats are not the majority at all. As I wore my wide-brimmed wrap-around sun visor to pick up Kaia today on this 90-plus-degree F day, I realized that I was still in the minority for wearing a hat. Even when I was in Chinatown, where there tends to be more Asians, and Asian people in general are more protective over their skin getting exposed to UV rays, people wearing hats were not the majority. We don’t have a fraction of the “Slip, Slop, Slap!” campaign happening here in the U.S., but we really should!

I told my friend and her husband on Saturday when we met that I have zero shame for my wide-brimmed sun visor, and I’m pretty darn proud to wear it now. I’m turning 40 in the next six months, and I have no reason to be embarrassed for taking care of my skin health. And I mean it!

Building friends and play dates

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While living in New York, what I’ve always wanted was a friend who lived walking distance who I can just say, “Hey, are you free? Want to grab coffee/take a walk in the park?” During this whole time I’ve lived in New York, I’ve only ever had one real friend who lived within walking distance, and frankly, we never had that type of relationship with each other. We probably saw each other at the same frequency we’d see each other if we didn’t live close by.

When we lived in this building, and especially after Kaia was born, I thought it would be amazing if I could make other mom or dad friends in the building. This… was a desire, but it barely came into fruition. In my mind, this seemed like an ideal setup: our kids could play together and entertain themselves while we’d have adult conversation or meals. I attempted a friendship with at least three different parents in the building. One was a dad, who has since moved out, but he was the most reciprocal. He actually did reach out to do play dates, but unfortunately his son (two months older than Kaia) and Kaia did NOT get along (his son wanted to throw toys at and hit Kaia, and Kaia did not like him). The second was a mom who had a son about four months younger than Kaia. I tried reaching out a few times to set up play dates, and she always said she was busy, so we never actually did an official play date. She never reached out unless she had childcare or kid product questions (fun). The third is someone I met at the gym; we’re both called “gym rats” by our building trainer because we’re always at the gym every weekday. We were quite friendly. She gave a baby gift when Kaia was born and gave me endless suggestions for baby products and stores because she had friends having babies (and she was doing IVF, which she later revealed). We invited her to our Thanksgiving meal just a couple weeks before Kaia was born. I was invited to both her baby showers and attended the first one. But when I’ve tried to schedule play dates with our kids, it’s never worked. Again, she also has never reached out to arrange any date. I figured that I should just let the idea go and came to the conclusion I was just never going to make nearby parent friends.

Then earlier this year, I took Kaia to the pool on our roof, and we happened to swim with a mom who had a son about five months younger than Kaia. We made some small talk, and since she didn’t have her phone, she asked me to leave my name and number with the lifeguard, and she’d contact me for a future play date. I didn’t think anything of it because of my previous experiences attempting to meet up with other neighbors for play dates. But then about three days later, she sent me a message on Whatspp and asked to arrange a play date in the coming weeks. Since then, we’ve had three play dates — one at the play room/library, one at the pool, and the most recent one was today, when we started at the pool; after, I invited them over to our place for snacks (I made whole grain chocolate banana mini muffins for the kids, plus I had Peruvian dark chocolate to share, along with some fruit and roasted sweet potatoes for the kids). The kids played with Kaia’s toys; Kaia was really sweet and actually laid out a lot of her favorite toys and arranged them “just so” so that Hugo could decide which toys he wanted to play with alongside her. They fought over her Peppa Pig bus and ice cream truck. They got excited and started squealing when we took some balloons out for blowing up. And they eventually started bonding over Kaia’s book collection, when they spent a good 40 minutes just reading books together, sharing stories, and taking turns with books over and over. While they played, we chatted about work, travel, different countries and cultures, and local restaurants and play areas.

Our neighbor’s work and travel schedule is a bit hectic for the next couple months, so our next play date isn’t until the beginning of October; she wanted to confirm while we were together and put it in her calendar so she didn’t forget, which I really appreciate. But it feels really good to finally have a friend in the building who has a child similar in age to Kaia who I can enjoy spending time with. It took a while, but it has finally happened! I’ve made a real neighbor friend (with a child!).

A gem of a bakery in Ridgewood, Queens

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We had our brunch date with my friend and her husband today, and given our babysitter cancelled on us and all our backups were occupied, we took Kaia with us to Ridgewood, Queens, where the restaurant is. It ended up working out really well because Kaia had such a nice surprise treat at a local bakery we visited.

Rudy’s Pastry Shop is an institution in Ridgewood and has been around since about 1934. They started out as a German bakery back then, but now they do a whole array of different, delicious cakes and pastries (even including gluten free!). Chris found out about it and added to our to-try list. We came in for the cannoli and alfajores. I knew this would be a good spot for cannoli once I saw an entire glass case full of unfilled cannoli shells. YES, cannolis should be filled to order for freshness and for the shell to stay crisp! We got a large chocolate dipped one, which includes mini chocolate chips stirred in the fresh ricotta filling. We have had a number of incredible cannolis in New York, most notably off Arthur Avenue in the Bronx and in Bensonhurst, Brooklyn, but now, we have an excellent spot in Queens to add to our cannoli list! This one had perfectly whipped ricotta with just enough sweetness; the shell was thin, really crisp, and had the perfect crunchy texture. Even Kaia, who usually doesn’t like “cheesy” things, kept dipping her finger into the ricotta and eating more and more of it. And of course, she loved the cannoli shell.

Rudy’s has a comfortable seating area towards the back of the bakery, where we sat down briefly to enjoy our oversized cannoli. Behind us, there was a small table of elementary school-aged kids and some adults, piping cupcakes with pastry piping bags and topping them with sprinkles. I thought it was such a cute activity and figured they must be participating in some mini class organized by the bakery. But then out of nowhere, the owner Toni came by and asked if Kaia would like a mini cupcake piping lesson. She asked if my toddler would prefer vanilla or chocolate. Of course, we said Kaia would love chocolate. Kaia’s face lit up like a little bulb, as she heard she was getting a chocolate cupcake! With that, Toni came over to our table with a chocolate cupcake, a little piping bag already filled with fresh buttercream, a cup of rainbow sprinkles, and a to-go cupcake container. And just like that, Kaia had her very first cupcake/frosting piping lesson with this very sweet and kind owner; if only I had recorded more of her facial expressions when Toni came and presented the cupcake, the piper, and the rainbow sprinkles on our table!! Toni was so sweet, showing her patiently how to pipe and control the tip. She talked through the motions and guided Kaia’s fingers along the piping bag to pipe just the right amount of buttercream frosting onto the top of the cupcake. Shockingly, this whole experience and all the ingredients were totally on the house! Toni just kept saying how much the kids love it, and so she loves doing this for them. She said it wasn’t just a business; it was about building community. We were so touched.

I am grateful for the kindness and generosity of the owner of Rudy’s Pastry Shop. We’ve never had this type of hospitality in any establishment with Kaia to date. Kaia has been given endless freebies, little treats, and kindnesses pretty much everywhere that we’ve repeatedly been shocked by. But this one, single experience truly takes the cake (literally)! When we’re back in Ridgewood, we will most definitely be back here. I’d also love to come back and try their famous Black Forest cake, which seems to get rave reviews. When I realized their Black Forest cake was one of their signature items, it actually made me a little sad because I remember how much Ed liked this cake. I always thought the cake was overrated, but maybe it was because I never had a really good one? But I have a feeling that Rudy’s makes it the way it’s supposed to be, in classic German fashion.

Babysitter cancels, and all back-ups are unavailable

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We had plans to have brunch in Ridgewood, Queens, this Saturday with my friend and her husband. They planned to leave their two kids at home with my friend’s mom while they caught up with us. When Chris heard this, he said that it felt uneven and that we should get a babysitter, too, so that we could actually enjoy brunch. I hesitated, but I figured it wouldn’t be the worst idea to have a different babysitting experience and get one during the day time. So I asked our usual babysitter several weeks ago, and she agreed to come.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work out. She texted on Tuesday, saying a “family emergency” came up, and she wouldn’t be available that day anymore. Granted, she could easily have lied and just got an invite to the Hamptons or Jersey Shore, but regardless, she was not going to be free, and that was all I really needed to know.

I immediately texted my second babysitter backup. She said she already had plans and wouldn’t be free until past 4pm. I told Chris this, and he contacted his babysitter contact, who ended up being out of town. Finally, I texted a former daycare teacher if she could babysit, but she actually works her regular job on Saturdays now! So we’re totally out of luck. In the end, we’ll have to take Kaia to brunch with us… and likely give her more screen time at the table than we’d ideally like.

Oh, the joys of lack of decent childcare options when you really need them!

Making banh xeo after 3.5 years and paying it forward with baby gear

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I hosted some friends over for lunch today and decided to make a Vietnamese meal. After spending the last two weeks eating a lot of Peruvian and Ecuadorian food, I was definitely feeling a craving for something Vietnamese. I thought about one of my favorite Vietnamese dishes, banh xeo, and decided that this would be the weekend I’d make it! I thought about the last time I’d made this dish, and I realized it wasn’t since November 2021, or just a few weeks before I gave birth to Kaia. Then, I also made it for a lunch I was hosting. During that lunch in this very same apartment, some friends came out from Long Island to drop off several boxes worth of baby gear they were either giving us as brand new (because they never got to using them) or lightly used. So, it’s been 3.5 years since I last made this dish at home. Then, I was welcoming friends over who were handing down baby items to us. This lunch, I am handing down baby items to these other friends, including the stroller that we used regularly for over 2.5 years. All these baby items are expensive and add up, plus they take up space. So, I was happy to give new life to a lot of these items, as well as clear space in my closets!

Then when I made banh xeo, I am willing to bet I made it in either my Scanpan (in other words, “fake” or “healthier” nonstick) or in a ceramic pan (also seemingly fake since the ceramic coating barely lasts at all!). This time was the very first time I was not using a nonstick pan; instead, I was using my carbon steel pan and was a bit wary of whether the crepe would stick and make a mess. But, I figured that since these are supposed to be my “forever” and “healthy” pans that I had to give it a try. If this works with banh xeo, then my next step would be to try out making my beloved banh cuon in them!

Somehow, I was able to get it. After a few tries, I was able to get the crepe to release itself from the pan, and the crispiness turned out well. I did experience some hot spots where some parts crisped (and almost burnt) more than others, but I realized that yes, I could successfully make banh xeo in my carbon steel pans as long as I had the heat calibrated just right. It just takes some patience; each banh xeo needs about 10 minutes of cooking time to fully cook through, crisp up, and properly release from the pan. As I kept cooking, I also got those beautiful lacy edges on the crepe that I love so much (and are particularly crispy!).

Banh xeo is a food to share. Whether eaten and wrapped in rice paper or lettuce with herbs, it’s a food that really makes eating a true “activity.” So I’m happy to make it for loved ones who can appreciate that it’s a labor of love, but also a labor of deliciousness.

Bay Ridge food crawl: Yemeni coffee and food, and Brooklyn Baklava

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Yemeni coffee houses have been popping up all over New York City in the last several years. We first learned about Qahwah House in Williamsburg, which has been expanding its footprint in Queens and also now in Manhattan, around the pandemic period. Then, Haraz Coffee House at Spring Street opened in this huge, luxurious corner space in downtown Manhattan. My friend is obsessed with it ever since since we went because she loves that it’s a coffee house that stays open so late. This is actually by design: many of these Yemeni coffee houses are open late as a safe, comfortable place for people to hang out and catch up given that it’s not in Yemeni culture (which is 99 percent Muslim) to go out and drink alcohol. And yes, these are actually places with space, with proper tables and chairs, for you to enjoy your coffee and socialize. Thankfully, they are not just teeny tiny places to grab coffee and go that have zero seats. Yemen is considered the birthplace of coffee, and so it’s been really fun and delicious to enjoy their coffee flavors and traditional brewing methods. The coffee and tea flavors are also adjacent to my favorite Indian chai flavors, as the traditional Yemeni style tea is brewed with milk, sugar, cardamom, and ginger. So it seemed only natural that I was going to like Yemeni coffee houses.

Today, we went out to Bay Ridge in Brooklyn, and we tried a new Yemeni cafe called Crafted Cafe, where we got a Yemeni style latte (espresso with ginger and cardamom), a honey whipped iced latte with whipped honey and cream, garnished with Varlhona cocoa), and a nutella croissant (to tide Pookster over since she seemed a bit hangry). The latte tasted exactly like it sounds and really hit the spot; I loved the spice flavors. Chris really enjoyed his honey whipped latte, which was carefully crafted and extremely luxurious in its texture and taste. We ate at a Mexican spot in their backyard, and then we ended our dining-in time with another Yemeni business, a restaurant called Yemenat. There, we had the foule, a rich starter of mashed fava beans with smoked ghee, which came with a huge, Yemeni charred flat bread; the lamb haneeth, or braised lamb shoulder over Hadrani rice, and a Yemeni sundae, which was a cardamom gelato over Abu-Walad crumble, topped with Samna caramel and hawaji almonds. For drinks, we enjoyed the aseer leem, a sweet limeade flavored with mint and milk, plus a pomenegrate juice (mostly to appease Pookster). I always feel like these outer borough restaurant meals we have are always the show-stoppers, the ones where literally every dish and even every drink we have is incredible. Everything we ordered here was delicious and noteworthy. The bread that came with the foule was a huge highlight, but it’s hard to say that was better or even less good versus the Hadrani rice, which had grains all perfectly separated and seasoned; the lamb was fall-apart tender and perfectly seasoned. I was pretty stuffed by the time we left, and we had ample food left over to eat the next few days.

We also stopped by a place we found last year when we came to Bay Ridge called Brooklyn Baklava. I am partial to this business vs. other Middle Eastern pastry shops in the area because they are not only friendly, but generous with samples. As soon as we came in, the woman behind the counter gave Kaia a little coconut bar, on the house! I asked about their sesame cookies, and the employee immediately opened a box of assorted sample cookies for each of us to take one and try. When she saw that I split one with Chris, she said we could take one each, and also insisted that Kaia get a cookie sample (we declined that, though). So I picked up a small box of the sesame cookies, and I couldn’t resist the maamoul cookies stuffed with pistachios I got from last year. “Maamoul” literally means filled” in Arabic, and it’s usually filled with date paste or nuts (usually pistachio or walnut). At Brooklyn Baklava, they are shaped like fat half moons. Maamoul are super delicate, buttery, melt-in-your-mouth cookies that are little symbols of hospitality and celebration in Arab culture. They are so delicate and buttery that each cookie is wrapped in paper for you to eat, as the creators are mindful that the cookie will literally shatter everywhere and cause a mess if not contained in the tiny paper bag! I forgot how good these cookies were. When we got home, and after my stomach had a few hours to rest and not eat, I decided I had to try one of these maamoul fresh. And as soon as I took one bite, I realized they tasted even better than I remember. They are so buttery and delicate; I got crumbs all over the kitchen counter. And the pistachio was mashed into this thick, delicious paste that was almost chewy, but definitely “not too sweet” and very nutty. The scent was like a mix of pistachio, sugar, and maybe rose or orange blossom? The cookies are not cheap, but they are most definitely worth it.

Bay Ridge is a delicious place. Every time we have one of these Saturday outings, I remember again and again how lucky and privileged I am to live in the diversity and deliciousness of New York City.

Missing magnets are found to add to the magnet boards!

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About halfway through last year, we had covered all three of the large magnet boards that Chris set up for us to display places we’ve visited around the world. Two are prominently displayed in our kitchen. The third is above the dresser in Pookster’s bedroom. We bought a set of two smaller magnet boards and were planning to hang at least one of them up this year. I gathered all the remaining magnets from the middle of last year through our Guangzhou trip this past January, hoping that Chris would put them on the fourth board and hang them up. Well, he didn’t do this, so I ended up taking all the magnets and tucking them away somewhere. When I went to go retrieve them after we came back from Guatemala in May, I realized I didn’t know where they were anymore.

So I combed through multiple closets and drawers, trying to see if I could remember where I’d placed them. It made no sense that I could lose them. It was a decent quantity (and thus weight) of magnets. This apartment is only so big, so there were only so many places where I could have put them. And while organizing Kaia’s things and setting aside clothes she’d outgrown to give away, I realized the magnet collection was in my camera box in her walk-in closet the whole time! I was victorious! I took them all out and laid them out, alongside our Ecuador and Peru magnets, and put them on the board for Chris to put up on the wall.

He put them up this late afternoon, and I went to admire all our new magnets of the last year. We have new magnets from Uruguay, Chile, and Argentina from last summer. We have a new one from Albany, New York, from last October. From our Thanksgiving trip, we have an Alsace magnet to represent Strasbourg. And from our side trip back from Australia, we have a Guangzhou magnet (we already had a couple Hong Kong magnets from 2015-2016’s end-of-year trip). It’s quite the collection of magnets since 2012 (and a couple before that, which I ABSOLUTELY NEEDED to display, such as my very beloved rotating Disney World 2010 magnet). And when I went through magnets from previous travels, I realized that I had a handful that were gifted to me of places I actually hadn’t been to — or at least at that time. I found a glass magnet a former colleague based in Santiago, Chile, had brought when he came to our New York office for training. I remember I had told him that I liked to collect magnets from travels, so he remembered this and gave this to me when he met me. The magnet has a outline of the long, skinny country, and the words “Chile Al Fin del Mundo” or “end of the world.” Granted, I hadn’t been to Chile at that point in time. But we did go last year, so I decided to place it on our fourth magnet board as an ode to him and his thoughtfulness.

Back from a 15-day vacation and home-cooked food is all I want

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Our Northern hemisphere summer trip is always our longest trip away without any home base. This year, we were away for about 15 days, which according to Chris, felt like a longer trip than last year given that we had an overnight flight form New York to Santiago in June 2024. It felt like a good amount of time to be away to feel like we really got to reset and be offline. But at the end of this trip, while I am always a little sad the trip is ending, I’m actually happy to come back home, get back into my daily routine of exercise, work, and cooking. The part I tend to miss the most when I am away from home for a long while is cooking. A friend of mine thought I was crazy when I shared this, but I actually do mean it: cooking is one of my passions, so when I haven’t made anything in a while, my mind and hands tend to feel a little idle. Maybe at some point in the future, we could do an AirBnB where I could have access to a proper kitchen, cooking equipment, and be able to buy local ingredients to cook. But until then, this trip will always mean that we’ll be eating out the whole time, even if “eating out” can simply mean going downstairs to our hotel breakfast.

For dinner today, I made sure to soak lentils and rice the night before so that we’d have dal and rice as our base. I thawed some frozen chicken and frozen tomato onion masala. I trimmed the chicken and cut it into smaller pieces for a Malaysian style curry using the Sambal Lady’s Burlap & Barrel curry spice blend packet. The tomato onion masala got used in the dal I made in the Instant Pot. I cooked some jasmine rice in the rice cooker, and then I made two salads: Chinese-style cucumber salad, plus an arugula salad with beets, carrots, tomatoes, sun dried tomatoes, and toasted pepitas, tossed with a French-style vinaigrette. I also made a side of stir-fried bell peppers for the Pookster.

It always feels good to come back home from a trip and have home-cooked food that is less fatty, oil, salty, or sugary. I’m not saying all the food we eat out is salty, fatty, or oily, but well, you can’t really know what’s in your food unless you make it yourself. That’s what “home sweet home” is all about.

Shaxian Snacks – Fuzhou food

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Manhattan Chinatown is known for two large groups of ethnic Chinese people: the Fujianese (specifically those from Fuzhou, a city with many surrounding villages in Fujian province, and the Cantonese (my Chinese people). So many Fujianese immigrants came in the 1980s and 1990s to New York and created little communities around East Broadway in Manhattan Chinatown, as well as in Sunset Park, Brooklyn. The area between Two Bridges in Manhattan Chinatown and Lower East Side is even considered “Little Fuzhou.”

Embarrassingly enough, even though I’ve been in New York City for over 17 years now, I haven’t really explored Little Fuzhou or Fuzhou cuisine very much. While I’ve eaten plenty of their dumplings and peanut/sesame noodles, I wasn’t sure what else to expect from their cuisine. But once Kaia started going to school in Manhattan Chinatown, I figured this was my opportunity to check out the Fuzhounese holes-in-the-wall in the ‘hood. One spot that stood out to me is called Shaxian Snacks on Grand.

Today, I ordered one of their lunch sets advertised on their menu. This consisted of a bowl of steaming hot, almost milky soup with a large handful of Shaxian bian rou, also known as Fuzhou style wontons. These are not the same at all in appearance, taste, or texture as the more famous Cantonese/Hong Kong style wontons. These are small, about bite or even half-bite-sized, and are really springy and bouncy in texture. The wonton skins are very slippery and almost translucent. I think there was just very bouncy pork inside. The soup was well flavored — it was most definitely made with pork bones and well seasoned, almost comforting in taste.

The second part of the lunch set was peanut sauce noodles, the Fuzhou way. These were also very slippery noodles, rice based, with a savory and slightly sweet sauce. The entire dish seemed so simple and humble but was really taken up a notch with the preserved, pickled minced vegetables that were sprinkled on top. Originally when I ordered it, I wondered if it would be too much food. But when I finished (all of it!), I realized that it was just enough and kept me feeling quite satisfied without feeling stuffed. And unbelievably, this was their special “combo meal” set, so it cost just $6.99, which is crazy and almost unbelievable given how much food I got, the high quality and really friendly service, plus the fact that we’re living in a high inflation period where most places are giving you less for more money!

In-store shopping experience for clothing/shoes: a rarity now

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Since Independence Day in the U.S. is quickly approaching, a lot of businesses are having early Fourth of July / summer sales. One of these companies, which I like and follow, is Allbirds. I actually have never bought anything from Allbirds before, but I do own a pair of their wool lace-up shoes that I was gifted from my company just over three years ago once we hit a business milestone. And, well, I love these shoes. They are so comfortable and cushy, even three years later. They are warm when it’s cold outside and just right heat-wise when it is warm outside. The soles can easily be removed, and they are machine washable, which gets me really excited (and wow, that makes me sound old/like a mom). This means that I don’t have to fret when they get covered in mud or anything nasty; I can simply remove the laces and soles and chuck them into the washing machine, then airy dry them, and they’re good as new! Though I will admit that three-plus years later, the traction isn’t as good as they were when they were actually brand new, but alas, that’s just wear and tear since no shoes could possibly last and be perfect forever. I have lost count of the number of times I’ve taken them on trips, and as soon as we get home, I happily throw them into our washing machine along with our other dirty laundry from travel.

So, Allbirds was having this 40 percent off sale, and I really wanted to replace a ragged pair of slip-on shoes I bought 5.5 years ago in Indonesia with Allbirds’ Tree Lounger shoes. I was pretty set on doing what I normally do these days when I buy any clothing or shoes: I was going to buy them online, assuming I could hit the free shipping threshold. But then I got concerned about the sizing. The last lace-ups I got were sized up to 7 when for sneakers, I am usually a 6.5, and they recommend sizing up since they don’t do half sizes. Would I be a 6 or a 7 for the Tree Loungers, which only come in whole sizes, as well? I would guess I’d be a 6, but I didn’t want to deal with a return if I was wrong. So I figured the easiest way to solve this would be to pop into their SoHo store, which is just a ten minute walk from Kaia’s school, to try them on. The fact that I was even thinking about this and mapping the store was a bit funny to me… because it made me realize how little time I spend shopping in brick-and-mortar stores for apparel and how much I just shop online, click to buy, and then wait for my deliveries to come to me (and inevitably, deal with potential returns later). I cannot remember the last time I had a real “shopping” outing to buy apparel!

I got to the shop later this afternoon. The store only had two other shoppers, and the employees were all very friendly and helpful. I was telling the salesperson helping me about my size dilemma, so she eagerly brought out a size 6 and 7 for the Tree Loungers and also some no-show socks for me to try on. My hunch was correct: I was definitely a 6. They fit like a glove! So I picked these up plus a pair of no-show socks (also on sale!), nixed the box because I didn’t want the bulk, and went on my merry way. Most places are digitized now, so I just asked for a digital receipt to my email. The salesperson told me in the event I needed to do a return, I didn’t have to worry about not needing the box (save some trees), so we were all set.

Even as I am typing this now, I still think it’s funny that this in-store shoe shopping experience felt so novel to me since I do it so rarely. And then I realize that Kaia herself has no idea what it’s like to go from store to store, trying on different pieces of clothing and footwear to see how they fit and if they will look good on her. Almost all the clothes I’ve ever gotten her have been purchased online, with thee exception of gifted items we’ve had to return and then had to use store credit to buy replacements. I have a feeling that in the coming years as she gets older, she will have even more opinions about what she wears and doesn’t and will start demanding to choose her own clothing… which may necessitate more in-store shopping experiences for all of us whether we like it or not.