Today’s plans changed pretty drastically once I found out the AFSP OOTD walk was postponed, so I ended up having a lot more free time than I’d planned for. I did a bit of cooking during the day, and later in the afternoon, I messaged our neighbor friend and toddler who we spent time out with last Sunday to see if they wanted to hang out. We went from the play room to their apartment and then back downstairs to the lounge room over the course of two hours. For the most part, the kids were able to play together independently without involving us, and us two adults were able to chat about everything from travel to language learning/acquisition to one of my favorite topics: books! One thing (of many) I miss about being in a school environment is talking about what people around me are reading. I don’t have a lot of friends who read a lot — maybe just two or three who actively read and can always say they are reading something. But I love when I learn that people read, and I love it when people ask me what I am reading (which then means I can ask them what they are reading and potentially get book recommendations that I otherwise would not have known about or even considered). What we choose to read says a lot about us, and at its most surface level, it shows that we are curious and want to learn more about things that are not just ourselves.

I told her I was currently reading the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu’s The Book of Joy. But this past year, I read a lot of historical fiction about the Vietnam (American) War, the Cultural Revolution in China, and the Partition of British India into Pakistan and India. In the book about the partitioning of British India into Pakistan and India, one of the book’s main characters makes commentary about how ridiculous, stupid, and inward looking American news media is. During that period in the mid to late 1940s, she was studying and then working in the U.S. as an immigrant from India, and it was virtually impossible for her to learn anything that was happening in her home country despite the massive changes, cultural/religious violence, and India becoming independent. What she learned that was actually happening in the country was only through letters that came (much delayed) from her family. Sadly, this is not quite far from the truth today: U.S. media is always so focused on… what’s happening in the U.S., ally countries of the U.S. It’s always about what happens here, and if you want to learn about anything happening in other countries, it’s 100 percent on you. We talked about the media, and that transitioned into how she’s been working on her French, and one way she gets better in her French language acquisition is by reading… graphic novels! I was so intrigued when I heard this; I know no one who reads graphic novels. The last graphic novel I read was when I was in high school, and it was Persepolis, a book often compared to Art Spiegelman’s Maus. While Maus tells the story of World War II through the lens of the author’s father, who was a Polish Jew and a Holocaust survivor, Persepolis tells the story of the Iranian Revolution through the lens of the author herself and her own experiences. When I told her this, she told me that Persepolis (in French, its original published language) was next on her list! She reminded me what I learned during my four years of French language and culture in high school: graphic novels aren’t a big thing (they are barely known at all!) in the U.S,, but in France, they are huge. There are entire bookstores devoted to graphic novels in France, and they are truly considered (and some are even priced as) works of art! She said it was easier for her to follow a graphic novel and improve her French than an actual novel (very difficult for obvious reasons), and not only was she able to enjoy the art and the story, it helped her improve her language skills. This almost made me want to read Persepolis again. I even have a hard copy of this book at my parents’ place.

After our time ended together and I had to get Kaia back home for dinner, she thanked me for our time together and said that while she’s happy that Kaia and Hugo love each other so much and get along well, she’s even happier that she met me and that we’ve gotten to know each other well over the last few months. I would agree; she has definitely surprised and intrigued me in ways that get my mind thinking more. That is the true beauty of friendship and getting to know others who grew up completely differently than you.

Because I work from a coworking space in SoHo about once a week and Kaia goes to school in Chinatown, I get asked often what good sit-down cafes and bakeries there are in the area. In Chinatown, SoHo, and NoLita, this is especially challenging since rents are expensive downtown, and thus space is very tight. There are endless amazing Chinese bakeries and bubble tea shops in Chinatown, but the issue with the vast majority of them is that there is either extremely limited or no seating at all. The majority of them do not have a restroom. There are even tiny eateries that have no restrooms (and legally, they don’t need to provide one unless they seat 20 people or over). So I can recommend endless takeaway spots, but only a small handful of good sit-down cafes and bakeries; and always an added bonus if they provide WiFi in case I have to work for a bit before I pick up Kaia.

Because of this, I was pretty excited when I was walking along Grand Street and found out a brand new matcha place was opening called Isshiki Matcha. They have a matcha stand in Chelsea, plus a small sit-down location in East Village, but this space was really huge. They have bar-like counter seating, high tops, as well as tables where you can sit and catch up with others over a matcha. It looks like at night, they even convert into a bar and do matcha cocktails and wine. They have indoor and outdoor seating, WiFi, and a huge perk: they have a bathroom that is not only clean but spacious! This is definitely going to go on my list of regular catch-up spots for the area. I met a friend here for matcha (I had a hojicha latte), and service was fast and friendly, and the seating was very comfortable. I’m excited that the newer places opening up in Chinatown have seating and sometimes even a bathroom. We need more comfortable spaces to catch up!

When I think of dinner time, I generally think of the hours between 5-7:30pm. Growing up, dinner time was always around 6:30pm, as my parents usually got home between 5:30-6pm to start preparing dinner for us. In college, I usually ate dinner between 6-7pm. And once I started living on my own, whenever I’d make dinner plans with friends, we’d typically meet between 6-7pm. This became earlier once Chris and I got together (he has stated multiple times that his preferred eating time would be… 4:30pm!), and then now with Kaia with us, we usually eat between 5:30-6pm.

All the above dinner windows assume that you wake up at a reasonable hour in the morning, so between 5-8:30am. If you are waking up later than that, it’s likely that a 5-6:30pm dinner will be far too early for you. So when I started hanging out with my very nocturnal friend who typically wakes up around 11am-12pm and works into the wee hours of the night, I realized that the way I define “dinner” time is not at all what she considers an actual dinner time. She typically has dinner between 9-11pm. And so when I had previously suggested a 6pm dinner, she said that was “like lunch” for her. Granted, we had never met for “dinner” before tonight, so when we went out for a 7:15pm dinner this evening, she did consider it not lunch, but yes, an “early dinner” for her.

It would be nearly impossible for me to operate on her dinner schedule, though, with a typical 9-5 job as well as a young child at home. And well, I also like to give my body time to digest food before I sleep. So given this, I am happy that we typically meet for her breakfast/my lunch or coffee/tea in the mid afternoon. This seems to be the most winning combination for both of us.

Ever since we visited Indo-Java Groceries in Elmhurst earlier this year, which is just a short walk away from my former apartment in the neighborhood, I’ve been thinking about how I could come back on a Tuesday to have an authentic Indonesian lunch prepared by a very famous, local Indonesian auntie. The Tuesday auntie is the most famous for having home-style, regional Indonesian cooking readily available to locals in the ‘hood for the last 10-plus years. When I told my friend about this, she got really excited, as she used to live in Amsterdam for many years. In Amsterdam, given the history of Dutch colonization of Indonesia, she had easy access to Indonesian food everywhere. But she had forgotten about the mega Indonesian population right in her backyard of Elmhurst! So we decided that this summer, we’d go on a Tuesday and have lunch in the middle of workday… in the back of a tiny Indonesian grocery store.

The yellow folding table was teeny tiny, but enough for two plates and utensils to comfortably sit on top. We sat on blue and red plastic stools. My friend and I shared fish balado, beef rendang, curry egg and tofu, mixed kale, spicy green chili, spicy potatoes in chili sauce, and freshly fried shrimp crackers. The spice was not burn-your-mouth-hot like in Jakarta as I remember, but it was definitely enough to wake you up if you were sleepy! We chatted about work, travel, and our kids as we dug into our little Indonesian feast. This was such a New York city experience, an “if you know, you know” type situation. As we ate, we saw many other people coming in for their to-go lunch orders, as well as a few others who wanted to sit outside and eat. The grocery store owner graciously pulled out additional folding tables and chairs to allow the other diners to sit outside and eat, overlooking the traffic of Queens Boulevard at Grand Avenue. This was truly an authentic New York City experience right in my old neighborhood of Elmhurst, Queens. I loved every second of it, and not just the eating and friends catch-up time. I also enjoyed watching all the in-the-know people coming and going, picking up their pre-ordered food, enjoying homemade Indonesian auntie cooking. This was a real locals experience.

As my friend and I wrapped up our delicious lunch and I had to run to the nearest cafe to take a work call, all I could think of was: I just LOVE New York City. I am thrilled that spaces like this exist, and I love that I have such easy access to it. And I also love that I have friends who can appreciate these types of experiences with,.