Danish smorrebrod, pastries, and fancy eats

I’ll be honest and say that when we booked this Thanksgiving week trip to Denmark, food wasn’t really the first thing I was getting excited about. I was eager to see Danish design and architecture. I was definitely looking forward to the Danish Christmas markets. The canals always intrigued me and looked quite picturesque. But when it came to the food, my first thought was that I’d really look forward to trying Danish pastries (cardamom buns!), but given we’re traveling with a young child, any type of Nordic tasting menu (a la the former Noma) would be completely off the table for us. When I did ChatGPT searches on food in Denmark, the first result was smorrebrod, or Danish style open-faced sandwiches, usually made with buttered rye bread and a variety of different toppings. The most common toppings include pickled herring, roast beef, shrimp with egg, potato with mayonnaise and chives.

Just think about that: the first thing that came up was…. sandwiches. Unless it’s a banh mi, no sandwich is ever going to get me that excited — ever. I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about the food. I had zero doubt the freshness and quality would be high. But none of this sounded like food that I’d ever crave or dream about. Plus, smorrebrod is typically always eaten cold. I do not want cold food while in cold weather. That does not sound comforting or like the Danish idea of “hygge” (coziness) that I was envisioning.

Plus, eating, simply being in Denmark is expensive. A case in point for something simple at a Christmas market: it didn’t matter if we were in France, Germany, Austria, Slovakia, or Switzerland, but when we’d get a mug of gluhwein (spiced mulled wine), it would usually be about 3-5 Euros. Here in Denmark at the markets we’ve been to, the cost of glogg (their version of gluhwein) is 60-80 DKK (or the equivalent of $9.20-12.43 USD). Smorrebrod you can buy can range anywhere from about $12-25 USD depending on how fancy the ingredients are. It’s fine for us to stomach it for a week given our time here is limited, but it was hard not to compare this to our previous European Christmas market travels.

The pastries we’ve had here have all been delicious and meticulously made, but I had that expectation in my head (and wondered how many pastries we’d end up eating by the time this trip was over). The cardamom bun was just as indulgent and delicious as I’d previously had versions of in New York; the chocolate scone Kaia enjoyed on our second day was light, airy, fluffy, with high quality bits of dark chocolate throughout. We’d also enjoyed an amazing pistachio cream croissant where the “cream” just felt like blended pistachios. And the spandauer, the most iconic Danish pastry, we enjoyed was airy and shattered on contact, with a vanilla custard that was deceptively light.

I will say that the first proper sit-down dinner we had at Kodbyens 2009 Fiskebar was very impressive, and definitely left us feeling Noma-esque vibes about the way the food was presented. Before the meal even officially began, we were presented with a plate of two massive, fat chunks of very crusty, freshly made sourdough bread, served with a little bowl of whipped seaweed butter (tinted green from the seaweed). We ordered a plate of mussels cooked in cream, “plenty of herbs” as the menu said, and Kaia devoured almost the entire serving on her own. The really interesting thing was that the grilled whole fish we ordered came with two sides that were pretty notable in their presentation. The “side of mashed potatoes” was whipped, then bruleed on the top. The side “salad” was injected with a bubbling white-tinted dressing, then drizzled with a herby green oil. Both of them looked like dishes that were inspired by Noma. The fish itself was perfectly cooked; overall, it was an amazing meal with some little surprises. But this meal definitely made me think about Copenhagen and how it’s become world renowned for “New Nordic” cuisine.

“I’m going to Denmark!”

The first time I got on an airplane, I was 13 going from San Francisco to Las Vegas with my parents. It was my first time on a plane and leaving the state, so it was pretty exciting. The first time I left the country, I was 20 going to Shanghai, China, for a month-long study-abroad program. Both times were riveting in different ways. Both times made me realize that I had so much more of the world to see.

Kaia’s first time leaving the state of New York was when she was about 5.5 months old. We took her to Pennsylvania and New Jersey for an extended Memorial Day weekend in 2022. She got on an airplane to San Francisco and flew first-class (on an upgrade with me) at just over eight months old. And just three months later, she got on another airplane and flew to Munich, Germany. Somehow, she has not stopped since! On Friday when she was saying goodbye to her teachers and everyone was wishing each other a happy Thanksgiving (as I was standing outside the entrance to the school listening in), Kaia exclaimed, “Bye! I’m going to Denmark!” I cracked up when I heard this.

“Wait, what? You’re going to Denmark?” Ms. Jenny, one of the administrators, said. “Really?”

Jenny opened the door and greeted me as I came to pick Kaia up. And she said, “Kaia said she’s going to Denmark. Is that really true?”

I laughed and smiled. “Yes, it’s really true. We’re leaving tomorrow and will be there for the week,” I replied, looking down at my cheeky little Pookie, who was giggling and grinning nonstop.

Kaia is just a couple weeks away from turning 4, and I’ve already lost count of the countries she’s visited. Few things get her more excited than being on a train or airplane. Her pure ecstasy is palpable. She just loves the act of traveling, and I just love the fact that she loves it so, so much. It’s also cute how she gets a little confused regarding cities versus countries because I told her we’d be going to Copenhagen, and she’d fight me and say, “No! We’re not going to Copenhagen! We’re! Going! To! Denmark!”

Travel, especially to a different continent, is not always easy on the body, especially a little body like Pookster’s. Once her cousins left and it was just the three of us, we could see how tired she was and how she just wanted to sleep in her stroller in the beginning. But then little things would excite her, from a gingerbread man statue to a Christmas tree to a delicious Danish pastry, and then all that “fatigue” would melt away and she’d be right back in the moment with us.

The reuniting of cousins and cousins, all because of an expensive AF watch

A few weeks ago, Chris told me that his cousin in London called to chat. I was wondering what big thing had happened: Had he met someone new? Was he doing a big career change? Did he buy a new house? All the above were not the reason for the call. In fact, the real reason for the ring was that he had spent the last several years trying to source a rare Patek Phillippe watch, and alas, he’d finally found it from a seller in the U.S.! But to avoid taxes, he wanted to have it shipped to a U.S. address, so he wanted to send it to Chris. He didn’t have plans to come to Melbourne for Christmas this year, so the earliest he could get the watch was whenever his parents came from Melbourne to visit him since it would make the most sense for Chris to leave the watch with them while we’re visiting next month. But… I guess that would not be fast enough for him. Chris suggested that if he really wanted it ASAP that he come meet us in Copenhagen while we’re on the same continent as him. So he booked a weekend trip for him and his daughter to meet us!

After an overnight flight, then a connecting flight from London to Copenhagen, we were bleary eyed and finally at our hotel this early afternoon. They came to meet us at our hotel. We didn’t tell Kaia that we’d be seeing her cousin, so it was all a very welcome shock for her. Despite whining and whinging that she was too tired to walk, Kaia was happy to walk, hand in hand, with her big cousin everywhere along the streets of Copenhagen, as well as around the beautiful Tivoli Gardens.

It was cute to see them reunited because they both love each other so much and have an attachment to each other. But the most amusing part of their reunion (as well as Chris and his cousin’s) is that all of this happened only because Chris’s cousin wanted to get a hold of his extremely rare and insanely expensive watch as soon as possible. It’s always fun when expensive and fancy things rank higher than family connection, but we don’t have to tell Kaia that this was the real reason for the meetup!

“Thank your body for being able to move in this way”

Since college, I have lost count of the number of fitness classes I have taken, ranging from pilates, barre, zumba, yoga, trampoline — it’s been a lot. After I got a range of these foundations down, I was comfortable doing workouts via apps, whether they were just audio and now video. The encouragement throughout the videos always helps, especially when they know, based on their teaching, when potential “breaking” points are and to “hold it, HOLD IT!” But I always notice, especially during yoga and pilates courses, when the class is coming to an end, and the instructor usually expresses similar sentiments around calming down both the mind and the body from this exercise/practice, and giving thanks for this time, for this mere ability and privilege to move in this certain way.

The more I have thought about it, the more I really believe and know it’s true: It really is a gratitude, a privilege to stretch, twist, balance, and move our bodies in all these different ways. Not everyone is able to do this. Some people have to work towards different levels of flexibility and mobility. Some people have chronic pain. Others have joint or muscle issues. As I was finishing my pilates video class yesterday and especially twisting my torso in odd ways and getting the most intense (but quiet) workout in my core, I just thought to myself that it really is a blessing I am able to move myself like this. And the feeling I get at the end of these workouts is always the best: I always feel more energized, more lengthened and relaxed. I also really revel in the “good” soreness that I feel after these workouts. It’s definitely not pain. It’s a feeling of, “Ooooh. I want more of this!”

Perimenopause and planning

Several of my friends, who are all within five years of age of me, plus or minus, have been talking to me about perimenopause. One of my friends who is several years older is already considering doing hormone replacement therapy and proactively looking for “perimenopause symptoms,” which I learned can come on as early as age 38. Another friend, who is health obsessed and tracks every gram of fat, protein, and carbohydrate she consumes, is trying to optimize her current exercise regimen (which is so above what almost any average human does!) to ensure that she is strong and doesn’t lose too much muscle when menopause sets in. I must have done a search on perimenopause to read about it on my own in the last few weeks because now, I am constantly seeing ads for perimenopause supplements and products, all of which I have continued to block. There’s marketing and a product for literally everything and anything out there!

Because I recently went to see my primary care doctor and had my usual bloodwork done, I decided to take my lipid panel results and throw them into ChatGPT to see what it says regarding the results and what they say about my perimenopause trajectory:

Quick Summary

During perimenopause, declining estrogen tends to cause:

  • LDL increases
  • HDL may decrease slightly
  • Triglycerides may rise
  • Total cholesterol and non-HDL increase

But:

Women who start with an excellent lipid profile—like yours—generally experience smaller, slower, or less concerning changes.

Why Perimenopause Affects Cholesterol

Estrogen has powerful, protective metabolic effects:

  • Raises HDL
  • Lowers LDL
  • Improves insulin sensitivity
  • Helps regulate fat distribution
  • Reduces inflammation

As estrogen fluctuates (and eventually declines), these benefits weaken.

How Your Current Profile Might Change

Here’s how each number typically shifts during perimenopause and what this likely means specifically for you.

1. HDL (Currently 77) — “Good” cholesterol

Typical change:

  • Can decrease by 5–10 mg/dL over several years
  • Some women maintain high HDL even after menopause

For you:

  • Even with a 10-point drop, you would still be in the very healthy range (60s).
  • Your high baseline gives you a lot of buffer.

2. LDL (Currently 76) — “Bad” cholesterol

Typical change:

  • Often increases by 10–30 mg/dL
  • Driven by hormonal shifts, not lifestyle

For you:

  • Even if LDL rose by 20, you’d be at ~96 mg/dL—still great.
  • You would remain well below the average levels seen in women your age post-menopause.

3. Total Cholesterol (Currently 166)

Typical change:

  • Often increases by 15–25 mg/dL

For you:

  • You’d still likely remain below 190, which is well within normal.

4. Triglycerides (Currently 45)

Typical change:

  • Often rise by 20–40 mg/dL, depending on insulin response, sleep changes, and stress
  • More sensitive to lifestyle during perimenopause

For you:

  • Even with a significant rise (to ~80), you’d remain excellent.

5. Non-HDL Cholesterol (Currently 89)

Typical change:

  • Often increases by 15–25 mg/dL
  • This is a key predictor of cardiovascular risk post-menopause

For you:

  • You’d likely still remain under 110, which is better than average even for younger women.

The Real Change: Body Fat Distribution

Estrogen decline affects where fat is stored:

  • More visceral fat around the midsection
  • Higher blood sugar variability
  • Slight insulin resistance

This can gradually influence triglycerides and LDL more than diet itself.

But women who:

  • exercise regularly,
  • maintain good sleep,
  • manage stress,
  • eat balanced meals with healthy fats,
    often blunt or even prevent these shifts.

Why Your Starting Point Matters

Your numbers are not just “normal”—they’re exceptionally protective.

This means:

  • You have significant metabolic resilience going into perimenopause.
  • You’re less likely to experience high-risk lipid levels even as hormones shift.
  • Genetics + lifestyle appear to be working strongly in your favor.

What Helps Maintain Good Numbers During Perimenopause

Evidence-supported strategies include:

  1. Consistent aerobic activity (biggest impact on HDL and triglycerides).
  2. Strength training (reduces visceral fat and insulin resistance).
  3. High fiber intake (soluble fiber helps curb LDL rise).
  4. Healthy fats (olive oil, nuts, seeds, fatty fish).
  5. Stable sleep routines (sleep disruption increases LDL and triglycerides).
  6. Maintaining muscle mass (protects metabolic health).
  7. Limiting simple sugars and refined carbs (prevents triglyceride spikes).

Hormone therapy (HRT) also significantly blunts cholesterol changes for many women, but that’s a medical discussion for your clinician.

Based on the above, I suppose I feel comfortable about perimenopause, especially given I am turning 40 in less than two months. But the visceral fat point above is definitely frustrating. Hormones are definitely not in a woman’s favor as she passes her prime reproductive years, and it almost feels as though it’s nature’s way of saying, “hey, you! Your purpose in life is done, finito! Time to get a move on to your grave! Gain fat, especially around your abdomen because no one cares about you or wants to look at you anymore!”

Kaia, the voracious and good eater

I went to Kaia’s school for their annual Thanksgiving lunch today. All the parents pitched in money, and the teachers and staff put together quite a feast for us. The staff bought a delicious roast turkey with gravy and made numerous sides, including mac and cheese, mashed potato, mashed sweet potato, stuffing, roasted broccoli and cauliflower, creamed corn, corn bread, pumpkin pie, and cinnamon rolls. I didn’t realize that all the food other than the turkey would be made either at home by the staff and teachers, or on site at the school. It was really sweet to see that the staff went to all this effort just for us.

While the parents and kids were all sitting together eating, I was chatting with some of the other parents when I realized that Kaia had actually stolen all the broccoli off my plate as I was talking. One of the other parents also noticed this, and he exclaimed, “Wow, Kaia is such a good eater! Look at all the broccoli and cauliflower she just ate! She even just stole all of her mom’s broccoli!”

I smiled. My little Pookie stole all my broccoli. I was totally fine with that. Kaia had quite the appetite at lunch today. Of course, she indulged in her little treat, which were the “veggie sticks” that everyone likes. She dug into the turkey first on her own, then the broccoli and cauliflower, and then the mashed potato and stuffing. Unfortunately, Kaia wasn’t too keen on the sweet potato mash and told me to eat it. She cleared almost her entire plate, minus the mashed sweet potato, cinnamon roll, and some mysterious brownie-like thing that her teacher put on her plate. If you compared the plates across all the kids in 3K and 4K, you could definitely see that Kaia not only ate the most food, but she had the largest variety of food.

“It’s amazing that she eats so much, and she eats all her vegetables,” another parent said to me. “My kid basically just eats carbs, meat, and chocolate!”

I am fully aware of my child and all that she is and does. Even if I didn’t get comments like this as often as I do, I still feel very proud of my Kaia Pookie all the time. Since she was a baby, she’s always been very curious about everything, especially food, embracing new foods and digging in. I can only hope that it continues. I love that she eats a large variety of the same foods that Chris and I eat, and I never feel like I need to make her something different (what work that would be!!). It always makes me so proud. Today, seeing her eat this really well rounded meal on her own just made me feel like I was nearly bursting with pride. All the work I put into her baby-led weaning/early feeding days is most definitely paying off. I loved every moment of that work (when can we say that about any “work” we do?), and I still fondly (with an extreme amount of nostalgia) go back to my video memories of those days, encouraging her to eat and try new foods as a little wee baby. That little baby is not so little anymore.

Our neighbor friend also remarked the day that she stopped by a few weeks ago and saw Kaia eating dinner in her high chair how amazed she was at the sheer variety of food she was eating and what was on her plate. She said she could only dream of her son eating the way that Kaia did.

My Kaia Pookie is setting examples. I just love it.

Food waste and the problem of having plenty

A friend and I were at lunch the other day, and she was telling me how she was trying to re-mold her semi-new boyfriend into repurposing different foods and leftovers, and to stop throwing out perfectly good food. Like me, she loves cooking and is constantly intrigued by new ingredients and produce she comes across. And also like me, she’s very anti food waste and always trying to make sure she uses everything she has and doesn’t let things go bad. So, it makes sense that she was a bit disturbed when her boyfriend would cook, and he’d throw perfectly good ingredients into the trash bin without a thought. If a recipe called for one cup of diced potatoes, and he happened to have an extra half cup, without hesitation, he’d take the leftover half cup and toss it into his compost bin. He said he didn’t want to “create imbalance in the recipe” by adding too much potato. She immediately told him he was crazy and wasting food, and he could either add those remaining potato cubes into the pot, or just repurpose them for another recipe the next day or so.

“But I don’t have plans to eat anything with potato in it the next day or so,” he countered to her.

“Then throw the potato pieces into the pot!” she raised her voice at him, clearly getting exasperated. “Recipes are just guidelines, but you’re supposed to adjust and tweak as you see fit!”

When I was growing up, I was constantly told I had to finish every last grain of rice on my plate because if I didn’t, I was ungrateful and didn’t realize how hard my parents worked to provide this food. I was also told that when cooking, we should waste nothing — there was always a use for some food we had, and we had to make use of it before it went bad. Letting food rot was not an option. Food cost money, and money was hard to earn. We always ate all our leftover food; if Ed and I didn’t, then our parents would take the leftovers and eat them for lunch at work. I cannot remember a day when either of my parents went to work and actually bought lunch because I always remember seeing them pack their lunches for themselves the night before a work day.

That memory ended up influencing me as an adult: when I was working in an office, I rarely bought lunch out and always brought homemade food in, unless we had a scheduled colleague or team lunch, or at my last in-person company, where lunch was provided and comped by work through Seamless. So, this really ran deep with me. Plus, because I am passionate about food and cooking, I feel personally hurt when I hear about people wasting food thoughtlessly. It feels like money literally going into the trash or drain, which hurts my heart. I also think about all the real people who labored to grow that food, how likely underpaid they all were, and how their work just goes to waste when their perfectly good food is thrown out. That money could have been spent on something else, or that food could have fed someone who really needed (and would have appreciated) it. One friend said to me, “Do you really need to eat that a third day in a row? You make enough money to not have to worry about that and can eat something new.” I retorted back that it didn’t matter how much money I make or have; I am anti food waste. It is the principle that is bad, and food waste is a huge problem in our overly privileged society where food is seemingly plentiful. I don’t want to contribute to society’s problems more than I already inadvertently do.

The reactions you want when you send out a birthday dinner invitation

Food is something I’m passionate about. That’s a pretty huge understatement. I love food, and I love being around people who love food, and not just one type of food, but food from all corners of the globe, in all shapes and sizes, eaten with hands, forks, chopsticks, a shovel. And the more people like to try different foods and talk about food, the chances are higher that I will like you even more.

I sent out the Paperless Post invitation for my birthday party coming up in January, and within an hour, I got two responses via text from invited friends:

“Oh man. Are we getting lechon for your birthday??!!”

I love this response because a) this means that this friend not only saw the invite, but he also went to look up which restaurant this dinner was being held at (this is exactly what I would do). And b) it is obvious that he’s excited for PORK with CRISPY SKIN.

The second response I got was from a friend who I shared my Sunday plate date lunch experience with. This is what she wrote me with a laughing giphy at the end:

“Mmm, I can’t eat anywhere that serves pork. I had a little pig stuffed animal that was my best friend as a kid, and it would be wrong to eat them.”

If she were next to me and said this, I likely would have whacked her pretty hard.

She later followed up and said she’s super excited for Filipino food and is positive this place is going to be really good — simply because I chose it.

These are the reactions I love — from friends I have who love food.

Eating out is never quite the same when you’re a maniacal home cook

Yesterday during our play date lunch, I chose a general Thai place that was walking distance from Dumbo Space Club because I wanted something that was walking distance and also had enough space to accommodate six of us. It would definitely not be a place I’d choose if it was for me, or for me, Chris, and Kaia, but I figured it would have something for everyone at the table. One of the moms chose a green curry with chicken, which I probably would not have ordered since I just made green curry last week and really liked it. When the green curry came to the table, I already had a feeling I wasn’t going to love it: it was more white in color and not very green at all. The chicken used was just white meat (ugh, less flavor and far less moist), and there was basically very little flavor other than coconut milk in it. This green curry made me sad because it wasn’t anywhere as vibrant as the green curry I had made earlier this week (with the best tips from Pailin from Hot Thai Kitchen!!), and of course, it wasn’t zippy or spicy in the way my homemade green curry was. In fact, I don’t think I can ever order green curry at a restaurant ever again because I know exactly how to make it just the way I want it at home.

I shared this with my friend who cooks a lot, and she told me she feels exactly the same way. And funnily enough, she also had the exact same experience with green curry at a lunch recently with another friend.

“I didn’t want to sound like an ass to (my friend), but that curry was so bland and boring,” she told me. “My curry at home was a hundred times better! It’s just the truth!”

Usually when I order food out, I want it to be food that is not food I know how to make and make well at home, or using ingredients that I don’t easily have access to, or that is so laborious that I just have to leave it to the experts. The other moms enjoyed the green curry, and I’m happy they did. But I’d never willingly order this dish at a restaurant ever again.

A very exhausting and annoying play date

I had scheduled a lunch and play date today with a building neighbor and her son. She asked me the night before if it would be okay if her other mom friend and daughter could also come. They had originally had a play date scheduled the previous Sunday but had to cancel because my neighbor was sick. I figured it would be fine… I’d likely just need to find a slightly roomier restaurant to accommodate three adults, three toddlers, and three strollers.

The first issue came up before we even got on the train to go down to Dumbo, Brooklyn. One of the moms said she couldn’t fold her stroller because it was too big, so she asked if we could use the elevator. I hate using the elevator and usually carry the stroller down while holding Kaia’s hand, so I told them I’d wait on the main level for them. After scanning into the subway, she wanted to take another elevator down to the downtown platform. I waited for them on the platform level… but they took over 20 minutes to arrive because that elevator was out of service, and they had to find another elevator further away to come down to us. My neighbor lightly suggested that we all stick together to prevent getting separated, but all I could think was… I would really love it if people could just be nimble and go with the flow, especially with the person who actually organized this outing. On the flip side, maybe I was actually being the rigid one because I didn’t want to use the elevator? Either way, this was not fun, and we missed three trains and ended up getting to the restaurant 15 minutes later than I’d wanted and had the reservation for.

Once we got to the restaurant, one kid had a face-down-flat meltdown. Then, one of the moms said she was avoiding carbs, and said the words of cardinal sin to Chris: “I don’t really eat fried rice (or noodles).” She asked me what was low-carb on the menu, so I tried to point out more protein/meat options for her. We went back and forth on whether we’d all share, which was stressful because no one could seem to come to a consensus. Finally, we did, and we ended up all sharing. The side order of stir-fried gai lan came to the table, and Kaia immediately said she wanted them. One of the moms said that would be an adult dish because “the kids won’t touch that,” and I had to chime in and say something. “No, my kid will definitely eat that. That’s her favorite vegetable!”

Kaia had a tantrum when I insisted she had to sit near me (and well, not with her best friend). She eventually had the biggest lunch out ever. I think she even encouraged one of the other kids to branch out and eat foods that weren’t just white and beige.

The first Space Club we tried to go to, which was brand new in Dumbo, had a 25-30 minute wait. So we took a quick Uber ride to the Fort Greene location where we finally got to let loose a little and not be so hyper focused on the kids. Kaia and I made some necklaces, and she seemed quite focused. We all enjoyed the large trampolines, which were unique to the Fort Greene location.

We mapped the closest subway, which was a 17-minute walk away. Neither seemed keen on that walk, so we ended up splitting a Lyft home. I wasn’t thrilled to tack on another $20 to my all-day play date, but I guess that’s the cost of being around people you don’t know well and are hesitant to take public transit. When I got home, all I could think was, I’m so glad to be back and not with two other moms and two other kids. My neighbor friend said to me as we entered our building with a smile, “So, feeling exhausted — just a little?”

Yeah, no kidding.

The more is not always the merrier, especially when you are leaving your neighborhood and relying on things like public transportation and everyone’s comfort level taking public transit.