Kids events in NYC – plenty are free, as long as you keep track and jump on them!

One of the greatest things about living in New York City and raising kids is the fact that there are endless playgrounds and kid-related activities — as long as you do the research, know where to look, and also jump on events quickly! Most of the free or low-cost events are, predictably, very high in demand and popular, so for you to get tickets to these events will require you to be on all the email or text lists and to act on them almost immediately. In the last couple of years, I’d been more on top of keeping up with Lincoln Center free or low cost events for Kaia in mind, but this year, I haven’t been as good about checking their website and opening all their emails in a timely manner. My friend, who has a child who is a similar age to Kaia, told me today that there was a new Beethoven kids event at the Chamber Music Society at Lincoln Center for May that he and his wife would be interested in taking their toddler to, and asked if I’d be interested. I saw that there was a steep processing fee to book the tickets online, so I called the venue to ask if I could go to the box office to get around the processing fees. She told me that I could actually forgo the processing fees if I just booked with her on the phone right there. But I wasn’t sure if my friend had a specific time in mind, or if he had purchased their tickets yet. So I asked her how many tickets were remaining. Well, the seating that my friend originally wanted had only TWO tickets left (there are five of us!), and the seating before had five left, which would have been an exact fit. The first performance of the day at 11am had already sold out. And this event had just been socialized the day before!

I ended up booking all five of our tickets for the 1pm showing on that May date. But it just goes to show how quick anything that is both kid-related and low-cost/free will go here in New York City. There’s always seemingly someone else who is more click-happy than you are!

Cool moms and their kids who think they’re cool enough to go out with

The other day, I was on the train bringing Kaia home from school when we sat diagonally across from an older mom and her teenage daughter. Kaia was being cheeky as per usual, so when she found out that I hadn’t packed any mandarins for her (her usual train snack, which she clearly now just expects), she got annoyed and kept turning away from me. At one point, she even tried to leave her seat next to me to go to another seat. The mom and her daughter were watching us, and the mom gave me a sympathetic look.

“I know it doesn’t seem like it, but that wasn’t too long ago for me!” she exclaimed with a smile. “And that little rebellion doesn’t end at that age, either!”

When Kaia realized she was getting attention from this mom and her daughter, she coyly walked back and started smiling and giggling at them. She got back on the seat next to me and kept turning towards them.

They both explained that they were headed to the teenage daughter’s very first concert. The mom was nervous, so she didn’t want her daughter going without her with just friends. I asked if friends would be joining them at the venue new Rockefeller Center, and the daughter said, “No, it’s just my mom and me!”

I marveled at this and said this to them. “Wow, your first concert is going to be with your mom! I hope that when my daughter is your age that she thinks I’m cool enough to go with her to a concert, and without any friends coming along!”

They both laughed. “I do try!” the mom said, wrapping her arm around her daughter’s shoulders.

I really did mean that, though. I do hope that when Kaia is a teen that we don’t have that stereotypical teenage angst-filled love-hate relationship with each other. I hope she knows she can lean on me and tell me anything, and that she thinks I’m “cool” enough to be seen with her in public, even to attend concerts and shows with. I hope that really does happen.

High vigilance with play dates at home

Today, we hosted Kaia’s bestie, his little sister, and their parents for lunch and a play date at our place. For the lunch, I prepared butter chicken, pea pulao rice, besan chilla (chickpea based pancakes with various vegetables), served with cilantro mint and tamarind date chutney, tofu scramble (was very impressed by this, as it really did taste like eggs!), and a mushroom and kale salad with cashew dressing, topped with sunflower and pumpkin seeds. We chatted about child rearing, the kids, work, commuting, and travel. Kaia and her friend enjoyed each others’s company by playing with and around each other. Jacob’s little sister slept in the beginning, then woke up to eat a good number of my chickpea pancakes and a nice handful of my tofu scramble (I was so excited to watch her eat and ask for more!). And then, out of nowhere, Jacob runs out of Kaia’s bedroom with one of my Christmas houses – the one with a moving train and lights.

I held my breath when I watched him run out of the room with it and present it to us. I calmly told him, no, he could not take that, and immediately walked him back to the window sill where all my precious real estate sat and placed it back in its place and plugged it in. I noticed my Hamburg Christmas house was taken apart (it’s two pieces). I examined it to make sure it wasn’t damaged and immediately saw the edge of the roof had chipped a little. It wasn’t the end of the world and only someone really scrutinizing it would notice it (so, really, just me), but I was not super thrilled this happened. In general, Kaia has always stayed away from the Christmas houses and a few other very delicate pieces on display in our home. But alas, I cannot control what tempts other kids.

It was just a reminder to me that I couldn’t just let other kids come into our home without watching them and being aware of what they could look at as “toys.” My real estate collection on Kaia’s window sill is really the only “property” we own, so I would have been absolutely devastated if anything had gotten destroyed due to a 3-year-old friend’s desire to have some fun.

Krob Kreung Krob Ros for Thai food in Astoria, Queens

I am pretty certain that New York City is the most diverse city in the entire freaking world. The number of languages that are spoken here, especially in Queens, is somewhere as high as 800, the diversity of the socioeconomic demographics is vast, and the variety of cuisines across all its restaurants is likely unsurpassed in the entire world. Of course, that’s my unscientific, no-data backed opinion, but I know that when and if we leave New York City one day, I will be very sad to say goodbye to this diversity in every sense of the word.

Today, during our Saturday food crawl, we were in Astoria, Queens, where we had lunch at Krob Kreung Krob Ros. The name signifies the perfect balance of Thai flavors: sour, sweet, creamy, and salty. The owners opened this spot for those who miss authentic flavors of home-cooked Thai meals, and for those seeking genuine Thai cuisine. So many of the dishes on the menu were things I’d either never seen before or had seen quite sparingly, even across Queens Thai restaurants, which are already quite representative of authentic Thai cuisine. We had tod mun hua plee, or banana blossoms tossed in a red curry and fried into fritters, and a pik kai tod kra thiam, which were fried marinated chicken wings with fried garlic that were unlike any other chicken wings I’d had in my life. The banana blossoms were crunchy on the outside and deliciously meaty inside. The fried chicken wings had a really thin, crunchy breading that was deeply satisfying to bite into. One particularly notable dish was the som tam tod, a friend papaya and carrot salad. The papaya and carrot pieces come out coated in a deep fried batter, and you take each piece by hand and dip it into the sweet, sour, salty lime-based dressing. We had definitely never had that before! We probably overdid it with the fried items, but they were all so unique and different from even the Thai food we usually order that is not pad thai or red curry.

I also really enjoyed the khao hor bai bua siam, the lotus leaf wrapped sticky rice with sweet pork sausage, scallop, jumbo shrimp, shiitake mushroom, salted egg yolk, and cilantro. The rice had a really nice, savory, meaty flavor, and it was really fragrant from being steamed in the lotus leaf. It reminded me of the Thai take of zongzi, or Chinese tamales.

Little gems like Krob Kreung Krob Ros is why I love New York City so much; just when you think you might be tired of it here, a new interesting, homely restaurant opens up to wow your senses and taste buds.

Catchup at Paper Sons Cafe

Since Kaia is going to school in Manhattan Chinatown, it means I have more reasons to be down there and explore new cafes, bakeries, and restaurants. And since I have a work perk that enables me access to coworking spaces throughout the city four times a month, my goal is to work in the area about once a week to get some space from the apartment, and also explore the area. It’s also a good opportunity for me to catch up with friends who have flexible schedules and could meet for a coffee or lunch during the week.

Paper Sons Cafe opened last summer. I came here this afternoon for matcha lattes and a catchup with a friend. The name of the cafe immediately brought a smile to my face when I found out about them via the Welcome to Chinatown Instagram handle because it reminded me of all the stories of “paper sons” in my childhood. My uncles, aunts, and grandma would talk about how they needed someone to come to the U.S. from China, so they’d pretend that so-and-so was their “paper son” or “paper daughter,” and then they’d have the ability to come over. Back when I was a young child, I had no idea about the complexities of immigration, nor did I understand the need to fake one’s family lineage for the sake of immigration. But now as an adult, I do enjoy hearing these stories of sacrifices that families made for their other loved one’s families in hopes of giving the next generation a better life.

The sad thing, though, about a “better life” in the U.S. today, is that I am honestly not quite so sure it really is a better life anymore. The cost of living is rising like crazy, where even a household of two working professionals cannot seem to afford a home easily without their parents’ help. The quality of schools here is poor when you compare our achievements stats to other westernized countries. The sheer intelligence of our population is declining, as made evident when you hear how few people here can read beyond a sixth grade level. And that’s before you even mention the normalizing of gun violence and prioritizing gun ownership over the safety of children. I am not sure that the country the U.S. today is the same country my paternal grandparents would have been happy to immigrate to.

A replaced fridge and a cracked bamboo kitchen floor

Last week, we had an incident where the fridge just stopped working. Luckily, we were home and caught it in time, so none of our food went bad. We live in a luxury rental building, so they replaced the fridge with a spare within the same day. Unfortunately, these refrigerators are so heavy that when the handyman and the porter were moving it, they lost balance and a corner of the fridge slammed down pretty hard on our kitchen floor, resulting in a big hole in one of the bamboo floor boards. They told us they would replace it. Well… they definitely took their time on this. They said someone would come today, and alas, the handyman never showed up. The hole is in a really awkward area where we’d inevitably need to step while getting in and out of the kitchen.

The great thing about renting and not owning is that we aren’t responsible for sourcing or paying for help ourselves directly, nor are we responsible for the costs or replacements of things like the fridge or bamboo floor boards. The annoying thing about renting is that you are really operating at the whim of your landlord or building management, and when they drag their feet on things, you literally just have to wait.

Reading to escape the dregs of the work world

Pretty much everything about work has been annoying me. Sometimes, I am sitting there doing work, wondering why no one is responding to me when something has been declared “urgent.” I have some difficult customers who seem to think they are the perfect customers and that nothing should change (you’ve really gotta love the growth mindset there). I also have some colleagues that have been really making work unpleasant, from the suck-ups to the full-blown gaslighting assholes. So in general, once I can sign off for the day the last two weeks, I’ve been pretty happy. It’s in these moments of frustration that I am so, so grateful that I am 100 percent remote, that I don’t have to go to an office every day and see people I generally dislike.

In the evenings once Kaia has gone to bed, I’ve been escaping the current annoying work world to read a book. This week, I finally started my much awaited (and very long – over 700 pages!) book by Abraham Verghese called The Covenant of Water; the book was released last year, and I immediately knew I wanted to read it because Verghese’s first and only other book, Cutting for Stone, is likely one of my all time favorite books. There is something really satisfying about setting aside the annoying world around you, as in, one’s reality, and just living inside a really well read book with complex characters and interesting challenges. I read a lot as a child because frankly, it’s not like my parents gave me much else to do. But now as an adult, I read for fun, for education, and for another-world adventure. And I’m so happy that Kaia has still been embracing reading as she’s gotten older.

Fun coffee shops during work travel

What makes work travel so fun is not so much prepping for meetings and transiting through airports and being in Ubers; it’s actually getting to discover and do new things, including eating and drinking new things. When I used to do work travel frequently pre-pandemic, even when I used to visit cities that people would oftentimes say were boring or lackluster, I always managed to find some restaurant or cafe that I liked, and that would be my “me” time to relax and enjoy a fun, new coffee drink or a new local dish.

The place I stumbled upon on my last Boston trip that I knew I wanted to go back to this time around was Phin Coffee House. It happens to be just a few minutes walk away from my customer’s office, and it’s also got a Vietnamese spin to it. This comfortable, trendy cafe has different variations of Vietnamese coffee, a few matcha and hojicha latte options, as well as a decent selection of breakfast and lunch items. They also offer free Wi-Fi, and ample, spacious seating. Last time, I kept it simple and just got the Vietnamese iced coffee since it’s classic. This time, I decided to get their Boston cream latte, which is a creamy Vietnamese iced coffee with your choice of whipped milk. I chose oat, and when it was presented to me, it was almost like a totally whipped coffee drink! I loved it from the very first sip — it was strong, creamy, and not too sweet, but sweet enough. If I’d had more time, I would have wanted to get a second one — that was how good this was.

If I’m lucky, I’ll be back in the next couple months and hope to get this drink again, along with maybe a matcha or hojicha latte, too, and even a quick bite!

Boston: Hello, again. I’m ready to eat you!

It’s my second time to Boston in six months. I’m here again to meet the same customer I met back in September, and I also had dinner tonight with the same friend I met with back in September. It’s always a fun thing to come back to a familiar city where there are people you know and want to see again. And it’s also especially fun to try new foods here (and revisit both old and new favorites).

When I reached out to my friend to see what she wanted to have for dinner when we met, she told me that I had come at a good time because it’s actually Dine Out Boston the next two weeks. So she sent me the website and suggested I choose a place walking distance from my hotel, and she’d meet me there. I chose a trendy, upscale Mexican spot called Taco Azul, which had recently opened its second location in the historic Beacon Hill area. The menu was very simple: guacamole and queso, freshly fried blue corn tortilla chips, a selection of tacos with freshly made blue corn tortillas, and two dessert options. The drinks were incredible: I had a classic margarita while my friend had a watermelon sugar margarita, and both were extremely well made, with just the right amount of sweet, tart, and alcoholic zing. This margarita was likely the best margarita I’ve had in years. The tortillas for the tacos themselves were so fresh and so delicious; I could have easily eaten just the tortillas on their own and been happy. And the fillings we chose — beef birria, shrimp al pastor, and crispy fish — were well executed and delicious.

If you asked me back in my college years from 2004 to 2008, if I would suggest any Mexican restaurants in Boston, I would have scoffed at you and said that was a crazy idea. Now, Mexican cuisine is taking over New York and Boston, and there seems to be endless options from both the no-frills/cheap end of the spectrum, all the way to the high-end, “tasting menu”-esque restaurants.

Cooking with Kaia… while also feeding her

Kaia as a three-year-old exhibits a lot of personality traits of both Chris and me. She is very cheeky, stubborn, and opinionated. She loves food, and she especially loves all the attention, all the time, every time. When she was a 6+ month old baby, I loved all the moments I would introduce new solids to her. I got so excited every time I saw her mushing something in her hand, each time she put new foods in her mouth and reacted. It is likely (and very predictably) one of my all-time favorite experiences in early motherhood: introducing new foods to my child and watching her react and embrace most of the foods. Some people said that I might get sad that Kaia embraced baby-led weaning so readily because it meant that I would be able to directly feed her less, as in I wasn’t spoon-feeding her each bite. But I honestly didn’t mind it at all because I was so engrossed in watching her experience new foods for the first time, while also simultaneously taking endless photos and videos to document the entire experience so I could eventually relive it all (and share with very curious grandparents). Now, the funny thing is: now as a three-year-old, she actually wants to be fed all the time. She demands that Chris and I feed her food, so oftentimes to get her to finish her dinner, Chris will stand above her, feeding her each bite; I will also spoon or fork feed her, bite by bite, while sitting in front of her. I sit in front of her the same way I sat in front of her as a baby feeding herself. Except now, she’s technically no longer a baby, but I am actually feeding her a LOT!

I’ve also found that the tip to cook with your child to get young toddlers into food that they normally don’t like or care for really does work. Since becoming a wee toddler, Kaia hasn’t loved string beans much. She liked them as a baby, but once she got to about 1.5 years old, she decided she didn’t like them. I made a Vietnamese-style stir fry of king oyster mushrooms and string beans today while having her watch me cut up the mushrooms and stir fry the whole dish, and she watched eagerly and intensively as she asked to try the blazing hot food. Before the food was even out of the wok, I took single pieces of it by hand, blew them to cool them down, and handed them to her. And crunch, crunch, crunch! She ate more than an adult-sized serving of string beans along with her favorite mushrooms just like that. Every time she asked for a mushroom, I said she could have it as long as she also had at least another string bean. And so, she went for it!

I’m happy that she enjoys watching me cook because it not only means she’s more likely to embrace even more new foods, but it also means I can keep her occupied and entertained while simultaneously cooking for the whole family to eat. I hope she embraces cooking and that we can do it more as she develops more fine motor skills. I’ve envisioned us in the future baking lots of different treats, and also making dumplings and spring rolls together.