To date, we’ve had really great babysitters and some flat out terrible ones. The ones that have been really reliable are the ones who are Kaia’s former daycare teachers. We already had a relationship with them from daycare, and so Kaia would not only know them already, but they’d also know her. All of them have been pretty straightforward in delivering on our asks, which are fairly simple given they’ve been with Kaia in the evenings: they play with her, change into pajamas, brush teeth, read books, pee, and go to bed by a certain time. Given the scope is so limited, it’s kind of hard to “mess” this up, especially now that Kaia is older and can speak and understand. She can also report back to us what happened in case there are incongruencies.

Tonight’s babysitter is a babysitter we sourced through my neighbor friend. She is the daughter of a former daycare teacher of theirs, and she also happens to be a Wellesley alum (ten years after me). She is Singaporean Chinese and is fully fluent/literate in Mandarin Chinese, so I saw this as an even bigger plus, as this babysitter could converse and read with Kaia in Chinese. What shocked me when she came, though, was that she brought snacks for Kaia (Icelandic yogurt and a fruit pouch), and even little gifts: a Hape coloring book, a Paw Patrol coloring book, and a Ty dragon beanie baby. She also came with about eight different books she checked out from the library based on the interests I told her Kaia had, and a set of colored pencils in case Kaia wanted to color.

The last thing I expect or want is for any babysitter to spend money on us. The whole point is that we get her time/labor in exchange for an hourly babysitter rate. So after she left, I told her to please not do this again The library books are fine, but any additional expense on her part is not. It was beyond thoughtful, though.

I wasn’t super happy that despite my notes outlining she needed to be in bed by 7:30 that Kaia pushed her bedtime until 9pm. She is the only babysitter who has gone past my stated bedtime. So I emphasized when she comes back in two weeks that bedtime has to happen by 7:30 because she needs the sleep. I can see Kaia can see this babysitter is a bit softer, and of course she’s manipulating the situation to her advantage. But I need this babysitter to be more firm, otherwise we may not be able to use her again. I do not want the Kaia gifts; I do need the firm bedtime to stay.