I have a friend who is originally from Texas, but moved to New Jersey when she was in high school and has been there ever since. She’s the only person I know who lives in New Jersey and regularly and proactively loves coming into New York City; everyone else I have met who is New Jersey based (most of whom were born and raised there, as well) avoid New York City completely unless it’s for work; they abhor the mere idea of coming into the city on a weekend or when it’s not for work. She never whines or whinges about coming into the city; she’s always happy to drive in and meet me. In fact, I have only ever seen her in Manhattan; so far, I haven’t gone to Jersey to visit her even once (maybe I am a bad friend, but she doesn’t seem to mind this thus far). No, it’s not just for work, as she is 100 percent remote in her job; it’s because she recognizes that New York City is literally the center of the country (if not the entire universe) for food.

She was hating on New Jersey people the other day and saying how mad she gets with their attitudes of New York City. She said she couldn’t stand how closed minded the average Jersey person was; most of them are born and raised in Jersey and never, ever leave. They don’t even want to go into NEW YORK CITY, she said. How can anyone be against New York City? she lamented. That’s like being against culture, against diversity, against life! She says the only reason she doesn’t live in the city is that she cannot afford it; plus, she’s trying to spend as little money as possible on housing so that she can meet her personal life goal of retiring by the age of 50.

I was shocked when she always wanted to hang out in New York and was so willing to drive to see me. She insisted it was never a big deal; she was used to driving and driving everywhere, so it was just her means to get everywhere. And when I told Chris this, he said it makes sense that she is happy to do this given she’s not originally from New Jersey and is from Texas, where anyone and everyone need a car to get around, and that’s just what life is there.

I thought about this during my day trip to Morristown, New Jersey, today, for a customer meeting. I basically spent all afternoon in a popular suburban town. It has an upscale, small town feel. Before my meetings, I met up with a local colleague who was attending the meetings with me, and we caught up over coffee. This colleague, who I get along with really well, is like one of those New Jersey people that my friend complains about: born and raised in New Jersey and unlikely to ever leave; rarely travels to see new things. He loves to nudge me every time I chat with him and ask when I am moving to New Jersey with my husband and daughter. And I always smile and say the exact same thing:

“Nope, no plans to ever move to New Jersey. I think Chris would much rather die. And I think I agree with him.”