Farewell, 2020

I want to say I want to forget 2020, but I realize that would actually be a lie. I don’t want to forget any part of my experience of this worldwide pandemic. I don’t want to pretend it never happened. I don’t want to deny reality or facts or data. What I do want to say is that I learned a lot this year… about the American electorate. About how terrible it can be to be employed by an employer that is not yourself. About exactly how ruthless and cold the American healthcare system is. About how people still refuse to accept reality and truth and data. About how selfish people really can be (how hard is it to just wear a fucking mask?!). About how selfless people can also be (healthcare workers and essential workers). The world is not as terrible as I sometimes say it is, but it’s also not as great as I want it to be, as we deserve it to be.

Relative to myself, my social media following has grown quite a bit for YmF. I barely had 70 followers as of the end of 2019, and at the end of 2020, I have over 815 Instagram followers. No, I’m not breaking any records or bragging at all about this because in the grand scheme of things, 815 isn’t a lot, but again, it’s all relative to myself. I had about 98 subscribers on my YouTube channel at the end of 2019. At the end of this year, I have 416 subscribers. That’s pretty decent growth if I’m increasing by over 4x, right? I think I deserve a little bit of credit here… And Chris, well, he thinks he deserves a lot of credit as the self-proclaimed “CE fucking O.”

I’m still trying to learn to balance, to stop negative thoughts, to be more positive. I’ve started meditation and am trying to devote at least 10-15 minutes every day to this practice in an effort to bring more calm to my life. I’m trying to be less obsessive over productivity and efficiency and trying to live more in the moment. I still have a lot to learn and lot of areas where I need to grow. Hopefully, that will be happening more in 2021 as the world, fingers crossed, begins opening up again.

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