I’ve never considered myself a high maintenance person, but I suppose we all have our own biases about ourselves and really need to hear what other people think of us. I’ve never been the type of person to spend an hour or two doing my hair and makeup in the morning. I don’t really care about brand name bags or clothes, and in fact, I try to avoid clothes or bags with massive labels or brand names displayed on them. I don’t expect lavish gifts for birthdays, Christmases, or anniversaries. But it’s all relative, isn’t it, especially when you are comparing yourself with people around you.

Chris and his demands of floor-to-ceiling windows in our next rental in New York City make me think I’ve now married a total prima-donna, and my friend and former roommate agrees. However, she reminded me how she thought that I was high-maintenance when we were looking at rentals in our attempt to leave our Elmhurst apartment.

“How was I being high maintenance?” I asked her incredulously. “Because I actually wanted a mailbox and a working doorbell?”

She didn’t answer and laughed it off, but she’s happy not having either of those things since she lives in an apartment building now that has neither of those things.

There’s a massive New York City guide to apartment rentals that outlines all the things that tenants legally need to have. Clearly, she’s disregarded this, as have most of naive New Yorkers who move here from other parts of the country and world because they want a cheap deal. I mean, I’m the reason we got a working smoke and carbon monoxide detector in our last apartment, and a toilet that did not flood.

The older we get, the more we tend to want and expect of our living spaces. Part of this is influenced by perhaps an increase in salary (is that elitist to expect that the older you are, the more you make?), but the other part of it is just wanting to be comfortable. However, one thing remains in my case, and that is that a mailbox and working doorbell will always be on the “must have” list. If you want to call that “high maintenance,” then so be it.