My mom was surprisingly pretty excited when I told her that Chris and I had chosen our date and location for the wedding. Of course, she also had to ask how much this was going to cost even though she’s offered zero times to pay for anything (I didn’t give her a straight answer, but she responded, “well, you don’t need to have a fancy wedding — just something simple!” Yes, because she knows how much weddings cost).  She always used to tell me when I was in college that when I got married, she and my dad would chip in “because parents should do that.” However, since I’ve gotten engaged, she’s made sure to repeat a number of times, “Well, you and Chris make a lot of money (note: my mother thinks everyone makes a lot of money except for her and my dad, which clearly is not true), so you will have no problem paying for the wedding. And I’m sure Chris’s parents will offer to pay.”

I never thought I’d ever have a wedding where my parents paid for everything, or my future husband’s paid for everything, or that there would even be a 50/50 split between the bride and the groom’s side. I’ve always just assumed that the groom and I would pay, and of course it would be great if both sides’ parents contributed because they wanted to and were excited for our marriage. I feel like I am at an age where I can’t really just “expect” parents to shell out money for me for whatever I want. It may have been more acceptable to me if I had chosen to marry straight out of college, but I’ve already been working for quite some time now.

Either way, she also surprisingly said that she and my dad would pay for the “welcome dinner” for guests since people would be traveling a long way, and that “it’s the tradition” for the bride’s side to pay for the rehearsal dinner. Actually, it’s the bride’s side to pay for the wedding…. but no need to tell my mother that since she has her fixed way of looking at things… which is usually wrong and only in her favor.