I just signed up for mentoring a child between the 4th and 5th grade beginning in October. The screening and interviewing took place last spring, but we get placed based on the school year. Mentoring is finally going to begin for me, which will be interesting since I’ve never been in a formal mentoring program before.

I’ve also managed with my friend’s help to get a few Trader Joe’s locations to donate food to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s Manhattan Out of the Darkness Walk that I’m participating in and raising money for, so I’m doing a few things this year to help remember Ed and keep his memory going.

Sometimes, though, I wonder how good of a mentor I’d really be. Because of how I was raised and my family environment, I feel like I have so much negative energy pent up inside of me that it may have the risk of negatively affecting someone else I may touch in my life. When Ed saw that psychic over 14 years ago, the psychic emphasized how much negative energy surrounded his life. It’s not that much different from what I had growing up, but I’ve managed to escape it and be far away from it here in New York. I wish Ed had that chance.