I’m packing my bag tonight to head to San Francisco for the rest of the week for my company’s annual kick-off in Napa. I suppose it will be a change-up from my usual routine, but I don’t feel particularly excited about traveling right now and would rather stay in New York if I had the choice. This is clearly a “first world problem” issue, as I’m expressing slight negativity about being in wine country. “Woe is me.”

I called my mom tonight since I’d be seeing her soon, and she asked me about the family dinner plans this coming Saturday. She went down the list of people she wanted to know were coming (and especially did not want to come). She gave a nervous chuckle after naming the ones she particularly did not like. And then I realized… this happens every single time I come home. An awkward family dinner gets planned where no one really wants to see each other, but they’re all gathering for the good food (because it’s San Tung, so it has to be damn good) and for the excuse that I am home.

I’m seriously contemplating planning a trip where I tell no one and just show up. Then, there would be nothing to plan or schedule. And then, there’s be no dreaded anticipation and no awkwardness.