A few nights ago, Ed came to me again in a dream. He probably decided to pay me a visit since I’ve been emotionally all over the place this week and thought it might perk me up a bit.

I was going home to San Francisco, and when I opened the door, I saw him sitting in the dining room watching a TV on the table. I ran up to hug him, and as I had my arms around him, I noticed that he was actually watching old home videos of all of his adult birthdays and times when he was receiving gifts. There’s one scene where I am bringing out a huge chocolate cake with a candle on it, and he has a big smile on his face. I asked him where these videos came from and who took them, but he was so mesmerized in watching that he didn’t respond.

The funny thing about this dream is that no home videos exist of us as adults celebrating any of our birthdays. We rarely even took photos unless it was just my taking photos of the cake or the food. In retrospect, I wish I had taken photos of us, but it’s too late now.