Buy-Nothing group brings goodies in the form of: shrimp stock!

One of the greatest communities I’ve ever joined has most definitely been the Facebook Buy-Nothing group within the walking radius of my apartment. In the last year, not only have I been able to give away plenty of things that we no longer needed or found useful, but I’ve also scored endless great things for the apartment, Pookster, and myself. The vast majority has been toys, books, and clothes for Kaia, but we’ve also gotten some occasional goodies for ourselves here and there, including Bundaberg ginger beer for Chris, and today: shrimp stock for me!

Hot Thai Kitchen recently posted a video a few months ago on her channel about how easy it actually is to make good laksa… as long as you have access to good shrimp stock. How do you make shrimp stock? With shrimp heads, shells, and tails! It’s difficult (nearly impossible) to find shrimp heads on shrimp when you buy them at places like Trader Joe’s or Whole Foods, but more likely if you buy them from Asian grocery stores. So I’d been collecting a few sparse shrimp heads, shells, and tails from takeout food we’ve gotten and throwing them into a small bag in our freezer for future stock. When I saw someone post that she had 7 1-cup cubes of homemade shrimp stock, I immediately raised my hand. I went to pick up the cubes from her apartment (very shrimpy smelling, so a good sign!), but she told me that she used random herbs like oregano, rosemary, thyme, and bay leaf (she said she didn’t cook much, so she basically threw her spice cabinet at the pot!). So now I’m not sure I’ll use this for laksa, as it may not have the right flavor profile I’m going for, but I can still use it as a soup base or a flavor base for grains like farro, quinoa, or even just plain rice.

Normally, I wouldn’t feel comfortable taking food like this from a stranger. But this particular Buy-Nothing group almost feels like extended family with how honest and considerate people are, and so I’ve really enjoyed being a part of it. The verdict for the goodness of this shrimp stock awaits when I come back from my Denver work trip later this week!

Inconsistent heat in a luxury apartment building in the middle of winter

Since we’ve come back to New York this month, we’ve noticed that in our building, which is a newly built, luxury high rise building in the city, the heating has been inconsistent. Sometimes, the HVAC unit, while on a heat setting, doesn’t blow out hot air and seems to just blow out… air. Other times, it does something even worse: it blows out COLD air. We are currently in winter time in the dead of January here in New York City, and this is completely unacceptable, especially given how much we pay to live here. So we’ve had the handyman come and look and tweak things a few times, but they quickly realized that it had nothing to do with our HVAC units per se, but rather the changes in temperature that a certain someone working downstairs has been doing to the master heating units.

The handymen let us know that our super, who seems to think that his paycheck is going to get some deduction for the amount of money spent on heating in this building, has been turning down the heat setting for all units in the basement. Yet, this seems to affect only higher floors… not the lower floors, where he himself lives. In the instant the super has made these switches downstairs, tenants have flooded the doormen with complaint calls about lack of heat. Wow – how surprising that tenants would notice something like this!

You have to wonder what kind of incompetence and total lack of consideration would have to be behind something like this. But hey, that’s fine. If the super of the building thinks he can get away with this type of thing with no complaints to management, then he’s totally wrong.

Pork bone and daikon soup – a traditional Chinese soup

Growing up in a Chinese household, soup was always considered the cure for everything. Have a headache? Drink soup. Ate too much fried food and feel “hot” inside? Drink soup. Caught the flu? Drink soup. Recovering from a sickness? Drink soup. “Drink soup” is the solution to literally all of your life’s problems as summed up by my paternal grandma, my aunt, and my mom.

Now that I am in my late 30s, I realize how much I took for granted all the delicious soups I grew up with, whether they were made by my grandma, my aunt, or my mom. Some soups were simple and straightforward and could be done in an hour or so. Others would be simmering on the stove overnight or for two to three days. I never knew how much time or effort they took since I was never involved in making them; I just got to enjoy them piping hot and ladled into a bowl for me. As with all kids, sometimes I even got annoyed with the elder women in my life for always rushing me to drink my soup. But when I look back, this is just the way they all communicated love when they did not have the words to do so.

Occasionally, I am reminded of the soups and flavors. Sometimes it’s via a restaurant that has a “free soup,” and I take one sip and get blown away because it’s like I saw a flashback of my grandma. That happened in the last year when Chris got takeout from China Xiang near Times Square, and the complimentary soup with a takeout order was a pork bone soup that was super milky in appearance, but just tasted so familiar to me. Other times, it’s via food blogs I skim or Instagram reels I watch where people are going “back to basics” with Chinese home cooking. And so that’s why I’ve decided that this year, I want to be more intentional with soup making. In a traditional Chinese or Vietnamese household, there would be a soup to begin every meal, along with 3-4 different dishes to eat with your rice. I don’t have the time or desire to do this entire show every single day when we eat at home, but I do want to make it more regular than just once every few months. So more frequent soup making is going to be a little cooking goal of mine. I’ve already started it by buying pork bones for $2.49/pound at Whole Foods yesterday and bringing them home to make a traditional pork bone and daikon soup. The taste of plucking off super tender, fall-off-the-bone pork made me feel right at home. Chris called this soup “gnawing soup” because I told him he was expected to gnaw/eat the meat off the pork bones. But I consider this “homey” and comforting. And I hope Kaia embraces this all, as well.

Settling in and thinking about 2024

We’ve been back for about a week from our four-plus weeks of travel. As always, it’s a bit of a whirlwind from the beginning to the end. The end is always sad, not just because our travels are over, but also because we are returning to a Northern Hemisphere winter. And while that winter may have been relatively mild over the last few years, it’s still what it is, which is… WINTER. That means it’s cold, the heater will need to be on, the apartment will be dry, and we will have seasonal sadness at the short days, long nights, and cold temperatures. The reality is that January in the Northern Hemisphere is always bleak. The festivities and excitement around Christmas and New Year’s have ended. And everyone is getting back into their usual routine for the new year.

I hate to be trite about it, but one goal that has been a goal since September is trying to lose the excess weight I gained as a result of weaning off breastfeeding/pumping. I’m about five pounds off of where I want to be to get back to pre-pregnancy weight. So while I’ve never had a new year’s goal to lose weight, this time around, I actually do… it’s just that it happens to coincide with a new year.

I’m also trying to stop grinding my teeth at night… which is a hard goal, but one I’m attempting with “natural” methods. I’d been wearing a mouth guard for years, but I recently realized that it was digging in my gums and possibly making defects in my gums and teeth. I had a new mouth guard made and am having it adjusted so that it’s comfortable. But a mouth guard doesn’t prevent you from grinding; it simply protects against tooth damage from grinding. And the grinding has been having negative effects on me this last year: I have extreme cold sensitivity in three of my top teeth to the point where I can barely talk outside in this cold weather and not have my teeth hurt. The dentists are planning to apply a desensitizing treatment to those teeth tomorrow.

A tip that my childhood dentist gave me years ago to prevent the problem of grinding was to put a wine cork in between my front teeth and hold it there for 10-20 minutes before bedtime. I’d follow it with a jaw joint massage for a minute or so. This would supposedly relieve any jaw tension (we all have jaw tension) and prevent my jaws from wanting to clamp down while I’m sleeping and thus subconscious. I’ve been trying that since we came back from our trip, and I do notice that my jaw seems less tense when I wake up.

Other little goals I have this year: I want to make more soup, which also means making a lot of the traditional soups I grew up with, that I took for granted, that my grandma used to make. I’m sourcing places to find pork and beef bones to help out with this goal. Soup is nourishing for the soul, and especially during a cold winter, but I also want Kaia to be able to appreciate traditional Chinese and Vietnamese flavors in the form of this nourishing liquid. I also want to explore more Taiwanese cooking, regional Chinese cooking, and Vietnamese cooking. I’d like to start cooking for friends more the way I used to before the pandemic and before Pookster was born. We’ll likely just need to shift to lunch time parties rather than dinner parties given Pookster’s sleeping schedule, but we shall see how it goes.

I also want to start doing more activities with Kaia now that she’s getting older, more nimble, and has increasing awareness of her surroundings. I’d like to take her to the zoo, the aquarium, and do more arts and crafts and cooking. I’m looking forward to the day when she can help meal prep with me and have already bookmarked some toddler-safe practice knives on our Amazon list.

I still have my usual goal of reading about one book a month. January is a cold, hibernating month, so I tend to read the most books this month most years. I’ve already finished one book this month — a mystery/thriller novel called A Quiet Place by Seicho Matsumoto. I decided on a Japanese author so that I could relive the sounds and sights of Japan.

More goals and things to do will follow, but these have been what’s on my mind for now.

Chocolate peppermint loaf/cookie mix from Trader Joe’s: the verdict is positive!!

A few weeks ago, I was reading about this infamous Trader Joe’s boxed mix for a chocolate peppermint loaf (or chocolate peppermint crackle cookies) that was so popular that it oftentimes would sell out and fully go out of stock by the time December hit. I specifically was drawn by comments from people who said this was a “box mix for people who don’t like mixes,” and I knew I had to get my hands on one box. So I got one, and finally today, I baked it up as crackle cookies topped with powdered sugar for our building staff. In previous years, I always made cookies from scratch, along with pumpkin bread, as a show of appreciation while handing out Christmas tips, but this year, I was pressed for time. So this would have to do. It was super quick to whip up: all I did was add some coconut oil, two eggs, and a little oat milk to thin out the batter since it was too dry without. I rolled the dough into 1-inch balls, dusted them with powdered sugar, and baked them for 12 minutes at 350 F. And they came out amazingly well! The cookies had a beautiful crackle on top and were like a cross between a cookie and a brownie. They also had a nice, rich chocolatey flavor, with just enough peppermint to not be overbearing. I could definitely get behind these!

Next year, assuming this box mix is still available, I might even get two boxes so that I could try it out as a sweet bread loaf, as well!

An expectedly delicious acai bowl at breakfast yesterday

Yesterday, I was invited to breakfast with the president of our company, plus three sales reps who all live in the general northeast region of the U.S. With breakfast work meetings, I am never sure what I will ever order. On weekdays, I usually barely eat anything for breakfast, so indulging in something like poached eggs with bacon always seems far too over the top for me. On the other hand, I generally hate ordering oatmeal in restaurants. Sometimes, I do this, but it’s only when I’ve had heavier meals the previous day and just need something light but nutritious to sustain me. Plus, I know how to make good, creamy oatmeal, and it always feels wrong to pay $15-20 for it, even if I am able to expense it to my company.

So yesterday, I ordered the acai bowl with mixed berries and a skinny latte. I realized that since acai has become all the rage that I’ve actually never ordered an acai bowl ever. I’ve experimented with different versions at home, and I’ve also had it blended into smoothies. I actually loved this acai bowl and couldn’t figure out how it was so creamy and rich… and then I went back to the menu description and realized that they just blended peanut butter into the acai. That was simple and delicious, perhaps something that Pookster might be open to, as she loves peanut butter, but she has yet to warm up to smoothies (she’s only had some homemade mango lassi once, and rejected anything else I’ve blended into that consistency to date). Almond or cashew butter could also work pretty well. So this ended up, unexpectedly, becoming inspiration to me for making at home, as I remember I still have a few frozen packets of acai in our freezer.

The other thing that struck me about this breakfast meeting out was that my portion of breakfast was probably around $30 once you factored in tax and tip. The acai bowl itself cost $18, which is really steep. Some people call it inflation in these times. I just call it price gauging masquerading as “inflation.”

Meeting Pailin from Hot Thai Kitchen here in New York City

I’ve been following Hot Thai Kitchen on YouTube and Instagram for at least the last 7-8 years. Before I “met” Pai on Hot Thai Kitchen, I used to think that Thai food was really complex and too complicated to cook at home despite the fact that I really love it. But when I started watching her YouTube videos, I realized pretty quickly that Thai food was just as approachable as Chinese or Vietnamese cooking, and they actually all have quite a lot in common in terms of methods and techniques. There are certainly differences with certain ingredients and the amount of certain ingredients (ahem, chilies!), but they all share a lot in common. So if I could make Chinese or Vietnamese food easily, I could likely do the same for Thai food.

I especially watched a lot of Pai’s videos during the height of the pandemic. I watched carefully when she discussed technique. She’s the main reason I even own a mortar and pestle, as I always thought about buying one before, but she convinced me that I really DID need to own one. So when I found out she was coming to New York, I thought about going… and of course, Chris pushed me to go. He even bought my ticket for the dinner event she hosted this past Wednesday at Som Tum Der, a northern Thai restaurant down in Alphabet City.

The event was far more packed than I imagined — there were likely over 100 people there, and all were huge fans of hers. Some had traveled all the way from D.C., Virginia, and Philadelphia just to have 90 minutes with her. I got to talk to her for maybe 2-3 minutes, and while time was tight and it did feel rushed, I was happy I went and got to see her in person. She’s just as sweet and friendly in person as she is in her videos – definitely authentic to her brand. I loved how she talked during the main discussion about how her two brothers were the real reason Hot Thai Kitchen even came into existence, and that if it weren’t for her younger brother pushing her (and even naming the channel) back in YouTube’s infancy days, HTK likely would not exist today.

Pai is definitely an inspiration. And I also loved chatting with her fans in person, as they are all people who clearly love food, especially Thai food, and actually cook! I need more friends who cook and are passionate about cooking!

The first lockdown procedure at Kaia’s school happened yesterday

I went to pick Kaia up from school at the end of the day yesterday, and as per usual, I asked the teachers how her day went. They said she was good (she usually is), how she ate, and then gushed over how much they adore her and how she always follows directions (gee, how come she doesn’t always do this at home…?). Then, the teacher said, “oh! And I almost forgot to mention: we had our very first lockdown procedure with the class today. And ALL the kids did so so well! We quickly hid in the back classroom and ducked, and when we told the kids to all be quiet and shhhh, they all did it! We didn’t hear a peep from any of them!”

My smile immediately faded from my face and was replaced with a glum stance. I recognize that while living in this country, a procedure like this is more than 100 percent necessary and needed. But it honestly hurts my heart so much that my child, and really any child anywhere in this country, should be subjected to this as just another “routine procedure” the way earthquake or fire drills were done in school when I was growing up. It makes me sick that we actually have to worry about this because school shootings are such a frequent occurrence. We are sick as a nation. And it’s infuriating that our government will do zero about this. This is not normal, nor should it ever be normal, but we have to treat it like it’s normal. And that’s just disgusting.

I told the teachers that while I was happy the lockdown procedure went well, it made me physically sick to know that this was the state of our country and that this should not be normal. They both shrugged and said they agreed, but hey, they had to do it, and the good news was that the kids were all obedient and went with it!

This is our world as long as we live in the United States of fucked up America.

Candle tunneling – a very “adult” problem to have

Years ago, Chris and I were watching a comedy special that featured Dilruk Jayasinha, a Sri Lankan Australian comedian and actor who did a standup bit on being an adult. Being an adult… means owning nice, high quality, expensive soy or coconut wax based candles with lead-free wicks. It also means understanding how to burn a candle properly to prevent tunneling.

What’s tunneling, you ask? There’s a strong chance that if you own large candles, this has already happened to you, but you didn’t even know what it was called, nor did you know how to fix it. Candle tunneling occurs on a candle, usually with a large diameter, when the candle burns for a short amount of time, too short to actually burn the top layer of wax properly (yes, there ARE actually rules about how long to burn a candle, and you really DO need to burn your candle long enough to ensure even burning!). This then results in uneven burning, which creates a “tunnel” around your wick. Eventually, this prevents you from burning all the wax in your super expensive candle and enjoying it far less. Seriously? Yes. This is a real problem.

Unfortunately, I encountered this with two candles already. One, which is peony scented, I was able to save with a method he mentioned that I also looked up, so this used both foil on the diameter of the candle, as well as a blow dryer. The second candle is still one I am struggling with. It’s one of my favorite candles, and one of the very few that I have purchased: a Tasmanian lavender candle I purchased at a lavender farm in Tasmania back in December 2015. I’m still working on fixing it, but it’s been quite frustrating to say the least. I love the pure lavender scent. I especially like to burn candles in the winter months because it gives a festive, cozy vibe at home. Plus, the ones we have just smell lovely. Lighting candles has become a winter time ritual of mine, and I don’t want my candles to get ruined because of some freakin’ tunneling!

Sunset Park, Brooklyn

Once upon a time, after visiting Ba Xuyen, my favorite banh mi spot in all of New York City, several times, I told my then roommate back in 2009-2010 that Sunset Park would be a good neighborhood to live in. It had a huge park nearby. It was in the heart of an area that has both a large Mexican/Latin community (like Little Mexico) AND a Chinese/Asian community (known as one of many Chinatowns in New York). The neighborhood had a really pleasant family friendly feel, which is basically code for “safe.” At that time, the rents were still quite cheap.

I still think Sunset Park would be a great place to live if you choose to live in New York. Since 2009, more fun, trendy restaurants, cafes, and bakeries have opened. I notice more White people frequenting the businesses we enjoy, especially Ba Xuyen. But every time we come back here for food, I am reminded of how I always want to eat literally everything here, but it would be pretty much impossible to do it given that we don’t live even remotely close by, and we come here maybe once or twice every YEAR.

In one afternoon’s visit, we had a black sesame iced latte from a trendy Malaysian owned cafe called Parlay; banh mi thit nguoi and jackfruit shake from Ba Xuyen; Hainese and roast chicken rice and laksa from Hainan Chicken House; picked up 40 pork and shrimp dumplings (frozen) and a hot sweetened soy milk from Kai Feng Dumpling House; got duck dumpling takeout from Orchid Dim Sum Cafe; snagged a guava/cheese flaky pastry and a vanilla concha from La Flor de Izucar Bakery; and split a beef tongue taco and horchata from Tacos El Bronco, the taco truck. That’s a pretty darn large variety of food right there.

So much good food in Sunset Park, but so little time! And that doesn’t even cover all the other places that I would have wanted to check out, both old and new for us!